Memorial Day Weekend

Hey, if you care enough to visit The Blog, I care enough to let you know the postings will be very slow over the next couple of days. Everyone be safe.

Lunch Time Observations

From yesterday: If a couple is going to beat some poor waitress down with stories of how "we are from Wichita Falls" and "my mother used to cook the best brisket", the least you could do is leave a tip larger than a one dollar bill. From today: The troopers were engaged in racial profiling based upon the numerous cop cars at the local Chinese restaurant.

Slow Day

But waste some time watching teens on a trampoline doing something stupid. And you have to love the concern expressed by his buddies. (And I can swear one of them yells "I have to pee" as he runs from the scene). Link (It is a video hosted on a different blog. I had to click the "play" button twice).

Friday Bag Of Nothing

Hey, Shorty, It's Your Birfday

Ok, you guys will not like this. Story. Heck, I should at least be able to get away with a Class B misdemeanor.

Bush Backdrop Generator

Link. (Self explanatory)

Heck, I Need Lessons

The crazy student-teacher couple that is Mary Kay LeTourneau and Vili Fualaau were on the Today show this morning. They are celebrating their first anniversary. Sheesh. They seem happier than most couples I know.

Ranger Notes

For a game I didn't watch, I noticed: - The Ranger's were down 7-0 last night and came back to win. - The game winning hit came from Phil Nevin with two outs in the bottom of the ninth. - Nevin had been benched earlier this week for sucking. - Rookie Ian Kinsler returned for the first time from an injury that sidelined him for two months by going 3 for 4 with two home runs.

Three Things . . .

. . . that got my attention from the news this morning: 1. President Bush apologized last night for using the phrase "bring 'em on" when referring to the insurgents a couple of years ago (Hey, for guys like me, he gets huge points for that). 2. An 18 month old was killed in a drive by shooting in Farmer's Branch (not sure I've seen a web story on it yet) 3. An Jimmy Buffett is on the Today show in retaliation for my smear of him earlier this week.

I Take It All Back, Paris Hilton Does Have Talent

Meet The Muffin Men

Here are the boys that came up with the marijuana-in-the-muffins prank. You think they want a "do over"? Give 'em probation and sin no more. We were all stupid once. (And some of us do stupid things to this day).

Quuuiiiinnnnnncccccyyy!!!!

NFL castaway and former Cowboy second round pick, Quincy Carter, is trying to make it in the Canadian Football League. Oops. He was cut after one week.

Jamaica, I'm There

From an email. I know it has to be legit because it refers to a Batch Number, Reference Number, and Ticket Number. Dear Lucky Winner, ELEKTRONIK LOTTO PROMOTION PRIZE AWARDS WINNING NOTIFICATION We are pleased to inform you of the result of the just concluded annual final draws of A Lotto International A Netherlands programs. The online cyber lotto draws was conducted from an exclusive list of 25,000,000 e-mail addresses of individual and corporate bodies picked by an advanced automated random computer search from the internet. No tickets were sold. After this automated computer ballot, your e-mail address emerged as one of two winners in the category "A" with the following: Ref Number: PC 9590 ES 9414 Batch Number: 573881545-LNG/2005 Ticket Number: PCP 3502 /8707 You as well as the other winner are therefore to receive a cash prize of $1,500,000.00. (ONE MILLION, FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND EURO ONLY) each from the total payout. Your prize award has been insured with your e-mail address and will be transferred to you upon meeting our requirements, statutory obligations, verifications, validations and satisfactory report. To file in for the processing of your prize winnings, you are advised to contact our licensed and accredited claims agent for category "A" winners with the information below:

Ms. Jackson If You're . . .

Maybe I'm Still Asleep

Did I just see a clip on the news of David Hasselhoff crying when the American Idol winner was announced?

A Morning Pick Me Up

Suicide notes.

Small Giggle For The Evening

Pat Robertson is crazy . . .

. . . and that was even before I learned on his web site that he thinks he can leg press 2.000 pounds.

Drunk Christina A.

Jimmy Buffet Redux

As I blew past the Academy of Country Music awards last night, I saw that Kenny Chesney was performing by Las Vegas' pool while wearing a swimsuit and a cowboy hat. For some time now, he's been trying to be a country Jimmy Buffett. I think he probably will. Twenty years from now, I can see him still having a huge following of beer-drinking-lets-go-to-the-beach fans. But please don't become exactly like Buffett. I stressfully reach for a pistol every time I hear "Margaritaville."

Let's See: $2.89 - $1.99 * 20 Gallons * 30,000 miles a year @ 15 mpg

Would you buy a gas guzzling SUV from GM if they promised to reimburse you for every penny that you spent on gasoline over $1.99 a gallon? Bad news is that you have to be a California or Florida customer to get the deal.

With Little Publicity . . .

. . .Sweetie Pie's has opened where Mattie's used to be.

Uh, If You Were Wondering If Dirk Was Fouled To Set Up The Game Tying 3 Point Play . . .

Dear Mr. President

A little known secret is that all of us liberals get together every night and sing this song with big ol' liberal tears running down our our big ol' liberal cheeks. YouTube video.

American Idol Giggle

Legal Humor

This is the perfect name for a Plaintiff's personal injury lawyer.

Ouch. But Funny.

A faithful reader sent me this link - be sure to watch it a couple of times for the full effect. We know Jason Terry hit Michael Finley in the unit during game five, but did you see Mavs coach Avery Johnson do the same diabolic act to one of this players during game seven? Great stuff. YouTube video.

Wendy From "The Wonder Years" [Edit: Make That "Winnie"]

The Last Powerful Texas Democrat Is Dead

"Senator, I knew Jack Kennedy. I served with Jack Kennedy. Jack Kennedy was a friend of mine. Senator, you're no Jack Kennedy." Story

Blair and Jo Reunited

I Wonder What All You Get For That Much Money?

From the Update: BIG PLANS FOR BIG CHURCH — Grace Fellowship Church announced it will build a 30,000 square foot church at an estimated cost of $4.2 million in Paradise. It expects the project to be completed in September 2007. Pastor B.J. Rutledge said the church, which was founded in June 2003, has 1,000 members. The "fellowship" churches seem to be a new phenomenon and time will tell if they will last. They refuse to be branded (don't call 'em Methodist or Baptist) - and you can't sing a song without guitars and drums. And I don't know if they have "official positions" on issues such as alcohol, abortion, and the like.

Very Nerdy Mavericks

How odd - a video of "The Avery Bunch" which is a spoof of the opening of "The Brady Bunch". It looks like it was produced with the Mavs consent but it is so wheels off - all the guys are looking around everywhere - the guys on the bottom will look down below - the guys on the left will look off to the left - and so on. Just strange. Youtube link.

Kickin' It

Spinning exhaust pipe. Buy one here.

Maverick Talk

I watched my first full game of the year tonight. One word: Incredible. The Spurs took the lead at 32.2 seconds left with a three point shot. I was convinced that the game was over. Admit it: you were, too. Relive the moment you thought the Mavs were done here on YouTube.

Sometimes I Come Across Cool Stuff

The Drudge Report . . .

. . . which I like to check out, lied about Al Gore today.

This Is Still Texas, Right?

KELLER - Keller school district officials say they regret that hundreds of people were upset by a decision to omit the words “In God We Trust” from a nickel on the front of the Liberty Elementary School yearbook. On Monday, district officials said they have received hundreds of complaints and calls from national media. The phrase wasn’t included on the nickel depicted on the 2005-06 yearbook cover because it “might create an issue with people of several religious faiths,” Superintendent James Veitenheimer wrote Sunday in a mass e-mail to parents. Instead, a sticker was included for families who wanted to add the phrase. (Source: Star Telegram)

Flag Shrinkage

There has been a great deal of buzz about the huge flag that has been flying off of 287 just south of Decatur. I had heard rumors that the wind was playing havoc on Old Glory causing it to be replaced every few weeks - at an uncomfirmed cost of over $2,000 per flag. (Like I said, the flags are huge). Well on the way home this evening I noticed that the usual flag had been replaced with a tiny one. What gives? (I took this pic on the way home. Trust me, there's a flag up there)

Funeral Talk

I went to Durant Clement's funeral this afternoon. He was considered part of the "old guard" of the Wise County legal community. The service was different than most I've been to in that 50% or more of it was dedicated to friends and family members simply standing up and talking about Durant. It was personal and touching. All funerals should be that way.

Church Killing

This guy is accused of killing five people yesterday in Louisiana. After all the appropriate thoughts, the word "mansear" comes to mind.

postsecret.com

Madonna Opens Up Her Tour In Los Angeles - Uh Oh

A Big Question Mark Formed Over My Head

Jodie Foster was a guest speaker at Penn's 250th Commencement and quoted Eminem's "Lose Yourself". Youtube video here.

Giggle

Avril Lavigne A Horns Fan?

X-Ray Of Kentucky Derby Champion Barbaro

Post-surgery. Edit: This side view is far more shocking.

Random Thought

As I watch 60 Minutes tonight - which is great because it has a ton of clips from past interviews by the retiring Mike Wallace - I wonder why the show can easily get away with dropping the "GD Bomb" without ever catching any flak?

Huh?

Someone want to explain this quote from Channel 11 reporter Raquel Eatmon as she was doing a boating safety story (which we've heard a million times)?: "We are also told that the water level right now [at lake Lewisville] is about seven feet below its normal level, and officials are hoping that is a good sign for them - that swimmers will avoid those deep, dangerous areas." (Channel 11 at 5:35 p.m.)

Movie Review

Name: Bubble Why Did I Watch It: It got a lot of buzz earlier this year when it was released simultaneously in theaters and on DVD (Mark Cuban is one of the executive directors). Oddity: The actors were plucked from the local community and given the title roles with no acting experience. (One was a KFC manager and the other a hairdresser.) Oddity #2: It lasts 71 minutes. What Is It About? A murder, kinda. But the "actors" weren't given scripts just a general outline as to where a scene should go. The conversations are EXACTLY what you would [Edit] here hear in Wise County during a lunch break. Police School: The local detective was played by, well, the local detective. Without the glamor of CSI, he is the epitome of how an investigator should go about his business.

Wow

Buried in the sports page yesterday (17C), there was a story of Highland Park pitcher Clayton Kershaw who faced Justin Northwest in a playoff game on Friday. Kershaw is suppossed to be a stud. He is ranked the top recruit by Baseball America. And at the playoff game, "more than a dozen pro scouts" showed up to watch him. But it was his first pitching performance in three weeks after a "strained right oblique." So how did he do? He faced 15 batters. He struck out 15 of them. (And he would have done more but Highland Park won on the 10 run rule.)

Ouch

I jog [edited] four times a week. Never feel any pain. I played 18 holes of gold (actually 23), and I am as sore as can be. And we used a cart. And the Runaway Bay Golf Course looked good.

World Wise Leader In Sports

ESPN's famed SportsCenter went nine minutes on Sunday morning without turning up the announcers' microphones. The insane background music was there during highlights and we heard plenty of "swish" and "swoosh" when a graphic would fall into place on the screen - just no voices. Then a test screen pattern with the words "NHRA COLUMUS" popped on the screen, and the voices were on. They never acknowledged this very odd emergency break.

Word Spreads

The video of Jason Terry punching Finley has been viewed over 33,000 times on youtube. Most of the hits came when www.deadspin.com linked to it.

Barbaro

A horse pulling up because of a broken ankle is a horrible sight to watch. But a horse ambulance is an odd thing. Why don't hey just call it a horse trailer?