Funny

Could someone possibly take clips from the movie School of Rock and create a trailer that would transform the movie into a horror flick? Yes they could. Genious. YouTube video here.

Worth A Smile

That Is Not Me In The Middle

Golf Fans

Check out this hole in one by Fuzzy Zoeller. As described by ESPN: Zoeller stole the show with a hole in one on the 170-yard 16th hole, an ace he never saw. Zoeller's drive landed in the rough on the fringe of the green and to the left of the pin. Thinking he had a chip shot in front of him, Zoeller stepped off to the side and asked his caddie for his sandwich. But after laying still for almost 10 seconds, the ball slowly trickled down the green and into the cup. Zoeller, who finished with a 68 to reach 7-under, gave the crowd a wry grin and a sarcastic thumbs-up after one of the most improbable of his 16 career aces.. YouTube video clip.

Other Baseball Pics

Decatur Baseball

Decatur is playing Abilene Wylie in the high school baseball playoffs today. They only need to win one of two games. The dropped the first one 18-9. I don't know the results of the second game. But Saginaw, where the games were being played, had some nice facilities.

Runaway Bay

Buried in a Friday Dallas Morning News story on counterfeiting was this: "An 18-month run of printing, selling and passing fake $100 bills at area stores ended with a guilty plea last month by a 45-year-old Runaway Bay, Texas man. Agents found more than $17,000 of his counterfeit money stored in a Bedford warehouse. . . . The recent roundup [of other men] was launched after one prolific counterfeiter wreaked havoc on local merchants in Runaway Bay." I don't think I heard anything about this. And why they didn't print the guy's name is a mystery.

The Burger King Guy Creeps Me Out

Happy 29th Birthday To Nikki Cox

Lines Get Blurry

A smoking hot 25 year old Lewisville teacher is accused of having sex with one of her students who is 18 years old. Hmmmmm. It's not a crime because of his age (the legal age of consent is 17 in Texas), but it is a crime because of this statute prohibiting sexual contact between a student and teacher. This teacher, by the way, sounds like she has a lot going for her. Here is her bio. (And this is her myspace page which is set to "private".)

I Love This Piece Of History I Walk By Every Day

She Hasn't Changed a Bit Since "Cheers"

This School Bus Will Never Run Late

YouTube video.

For Napoleon Dynamite Fans

National Spelling Bee

As I neglect the Maverick/Suns game at this moment to check out the National Spelling Bee on Channel 8, let me sum it up in one word: Fascinating! (Did I spell that correctly?) But the greatest heart tugging moments occur when a kid misspells a word, the bell sounds, and the kid then walks over into the loving arms of his or her parents. It is just great.

Never Get Between

One of the Famous Bass Brothers of Fort Worth . . .

. . . has died. The Bass brothers are single-handedly, uh, multi-handedly responsible for revitalizing downtown Fort Worth. When I worked there in the early 1990s, my buddies and I nicknamed the private security cops that patrolled downtown "the Basstoppo". We were pretty proud of that.

The Blog's Official Speller . . .

. . . Samir Patel, has been eliminated. Says so here. "Eremacausis" got the best of him.

You other brothers can't deny

I never thought I'd see a Baptist church take the lyrics to Sir Mix-A-Lot's "I Like Big Butts" and make it a music video about the bible. You can view it here. I have to admit, it's kind of clever.

Mariah Carey Walks Her Pooch

This Explains Why She Has Rejected My Advances

"Years after she first emerged from the Batcave, Batwoman is coming out of the closet. DC Comics is resurrecting the classic comic book character as a lesbian, unveiling the new Batwoman in July as part of an ongoing weekly series that began this year. The 5-foot-10 superhero comes with flowing red hair, knee-high red boots with spiked heels, and a form-fitting black outfit." (Full story)

No Food In Chico

The Pantry in Chico has closed according to the Update. With the exception of a convenience store burrito, people in Chico are now food deprived.

The Blog's Unique Visitor Traffic For May, 2006

I'm far more entertaining during the work week that I am on weekends. (Just like my social life).

The Most Amazing Story I've Heard In A Long Time

If this doesn't dominate the news over the next few days, I'll be amazed. I'm speechless.

School District Trivia

• In Texas, there are 1,031 independent school districts.
• Those districts educate over 4.3 million kids.
• That number grows by 72,500 every year.
• Half of the 1,031 districts have less than 700 students each.
• 25% of all students go to 12 districts.
• The largest district is Houston ISD with 211,499 students.
• The smallest district is Divide ISD with 10 students.

Source: Neeley v. West Orange Cove Consolidated ISD, 176 S.w.3d 746 (Tex. 2005).

$9,312

Estimated average credit card debt per U.S. household in 2005. Source: This week's Time magazine

Just Because

Suddenly I have an urge to pick up a sketch book and ask her to have a seat on the couch.

Trust Me, Good TV

Tomorrow night, on Channel 8, the final round of the National Spelling Bee will be broadcast live. This may sound like paint drying, but it'll be good stuff. (Check out the movie Spellbound). I hereby adopt Samir Sudhir Patel of Colleyville as The Blog's official speller (and Lord knows The Blog needs spelling help). This kid, now 12, has competed in the event for the last three years finishing 3rd, 27th, and 2nd. When I was 12, I was on the couch laughing out loud to Gilligan's Island.

When We Last Saw Kenny Rogers . . .

. . . (the pitcher) he was slugging a camera man. Don't look now, but he is 7-3 with a 3.76 ERA for the Detroit Tigers.

23% . . .

That's the number of Dallas-Fort Worth homes that do not have cable or satellite television.

I've Always Wondered About This

The NFL draft was last month and this month there have been a variety of mini-camps across the league that the drafted players take part in. But 99% of them do not have a contract. So what happens if one of them gets hurt? Well, one guy is going to find out. The Cowboys drafted lineman E.J. Whitley of Texas Tech in the seventh round. In his first camp last week, he blew out his ACL and is gone for the season. The Morning News tells me "the rookies signed injury protection waivers before mini-camp meaning the Cowboys would negotiate a contract in good faith regardless of the severity of the injury." Huh? I have no idea what that means. Some seventh rounders don't even make the team. This will be interesting.

It's Hard Out Here For A Girl's Softball Coach

From the Update: DECATUR COACH RESIGNS — Decatur High School head softball coach Amber Pearce resigned on Friday. DHS athletic director Kyle Story declined any comment except to confirm she did step down. She led the Lady Eagles to a district championship and to the regional quarterfinals in her first year. Her two assistant coaches will also not return. What gives?

I Wonder If That Was True

When I was in the Tarrant County DA's office in the early 1990s, a prosecutor that was hired after me told me he was the brother of the Central Park Jogger. I cannot for the life of me recall who that was. Or if that were true. The jogger's identity remained a secret for years until she published a book in 2003. (The last name of Meili doesn't ring a bell but it could be a married name.)

Conspiracy Theory

When I was growing up, one of my family members always had a conspiracy theory about seven game sports series. Due to the amount of money that was generated by the games, the teams would secretly agree to split the first four games and then play for real. The way the Mavericks dogged it last night, you have to wonder. (Not really, but it does seem weird.)

Katie Says Goodbye

As the Today show recapped the last 15 years of Katie Couric being on the show, it occurred to me: What a crazy country we live in. (Oklahoma City bombing, 9/11, O.J., Rodney King, Iran-Contra, Anita Hill, Columbine, and the list goes on. And there is more to come.)

Girls That Just Happen To Be Asian . . .

Act Naturally
Originally uploaded by Pure_Evil.

. . . are kinda hot in an odd way.

Munich

I started watching this movie tonight. So far, so good. But you'll appreciate it a lot more if you'll rent "One Day In September" which is a documentary about the Israeli hostage crisis at the Munich games in 1972. It is probably the best documentary I've ever seen (well, I'm still digesting the greatness that is "Grizzly Man.")

More Good Press

Fox 4 News ran a story tonight about some unhappy customers of Paradise's "Vacation In A Box". Paradise, Bridgeport, and Decatur got mentioned. YouTube video of the report is here.

American Profile Magazine

I don't understand why this "magazine" is in the Messenger every weekend (other than my guess that they pay to be placed in the Messenger every weekend). I think it's geared towards the AARP crowd (no offense to the AARP crowd, by the way). But I'm skeptical of everything in it. Case in point: This week's "Ask American Profile" included a question from Eryl Burnworth of Phoenix, Arizona. (Eryl?) who wanted to know whether his "favorite comedian" Rich Little was still performing. Rich Little? Favorite comedian? Apparently Eryl hasn't watched TV since 1975. Anyway, the magazine's response pointed out that Little "recently released a DVD called One's A Crowd, which is available at www.richlittle.com." Spare me. If the production company behind Rich Little didn't pay to have that letter placed in the magazine, I'll buy the DVD. I won't watch it, but I'll buy it.

Ka-Ching

I couple of weeks ago, I commented on Emmitt Smith and Troy Aikman appearing in commercials for the Texas Lottery. A columnist for the Dallas Morning News (while dogging them for promoting the lottery which, she says, is a tax on the poor) reported that the two split $238,198 for their services. Heck, that's like a regular guy winning, uh, the lottery.

Fox 4 News Is Killing Me Tonight

Story #1: A bunch of egrets invaded private property in Johnson County. And reporter Brandon Todd had to put on a surgical mask because the smell was so bad. (According to the landowner, the smell was due to, as he pronounced it, "FEEkus".) Story #2: Two teachers at some private school in McKinney (30 and 26 years old) were arrested for possessing a "small amount of "methamphetamines." As Heather Hays dramatically told me, the two teachers that were "busted" had been "entrusted with children's lives." I was soooo riveted to the TV. Story #3: Some "thieves" stole copper out of an air-conditioning unit at a church in Pleasant Grove. (Although I was pleased that Lari Barager had been forced to cover this very important story.) Story #4: For some unknown reason, Fox 4 decided to show us surveillance video of a May 14th burglary of a convenience store in south Fort Worth where some guy stole a bunch of cigarettes. All life force was sucked out of me when Clarise Tinsley told me, "Police could call him the Marlboro Man."

You May Be A Good Aggie . . .

. . . but your marriage has a high probability for failure when your wedding cake looks like this.

666

If you were on the verge of giving birth, would you take measures to delay or induce the birth so that the child would not be born on 6.6.06?

PostSecret Was Average This Week

Two Girls . . .

. . . remember the invasion of Normandy in the oddest of ways over Memorial Day weekend.

Uh Oh

There is a huge atrocity coming to light in Iraq. Excerpt: A bomb rocked a military convoy on Nov. 19, killing a Marine. Mr. Murtha, who has been briefed by officials, said Marines then fatally shot unarmed civilians in a taxi at the scene and went into two homes and shot other people. Iraqis who identified themselves as survivors of the killings described Marines fatally shooting 19 persons in three homes, among them a 77-year-old man in a wheelchair and a 4-year-old boy in one home and five children, ages 3 to 14, in another home, the New York Times reported yesterday. Time Magazine broke the story.

I Almost Feel Sorry For Britney . .

. . . when she can't even take a walk with rollers in her hair without having her picture taken.

Nicole Richie Needs To Lay Off The Cheese Burgers

I Loves Me Some Brevity

The first place Texas Rangers won again tonight. The most impressive thing is that the game took exactly 120 minutes to play. We need more games like that. But only 23,771 attended on Memorial Day with no school tomorrow?

Funny Commercial

I can't find an Internet link to it, but I love the commercial that shows the cable guy approaching a young couple while in their home, looking at the wife, and saying, "We should go out sometime."

Random Thought

In the city, the nicer the neighborhood, the more likely a person is to return a shopping cart to the shopping cart receptacle in the parking lot.

Morning News Letter To The Editor - Monday

"Anyone want to bet that Kenneth Lay and Jeffrey Skilling never see the inside of a prison cell? Their lawyers will get rich filing appeals, while these twocontinue to live in luxury instea of repaying the thousands they hurt." Lon Schoenky, McKinney Lon, where do I place my bet?

"If You Mess With The Bull"

Paul Gleason, who played the principal in "The Breakfast Club" died over the weekend. That was a great movie. I've learned that he made numerous guest appearances in TV shows from the 1970s such as "Love American Style", "Adam-12", "Mission: Impossible" that I'd love to see now. And he died from mesothelioma - a cancer caused by asbestos. What's that about?

Speaking of Jude Law . . .

. . . he went jogging in his boxers this weekend.

Movie Review

Name: Alfie Summary: Alfie, played by Jude Law, refuses to commit to any one girl and bounces around contemplating "what's it all about." Rent It?: Naaaaa. I think I could have written a better script. Best line: "It seems to me the problems you worry yourself sick about never seem to materialize. It's the ones that catch you unexpectedly on a Wednesday afternoon that knock you sideways." Funny line: "And the problem is, Julie hasn't got enough of the superficial things that really matter." Most annoying quality: Alfie constantly looking at the camera and addressing the audience. Interesting: I knew Jude Law hooked up with Sienna Miller, but I didn't know she played a big role in this movie.