Yes, No, No, No, Yes

The Indy 500 is this weekend, and for the first time in history the race will feature three women drivers. Milka Duno, Sarah Fisher (second from left), and Danica Patrick (right). The other ladies in the picture there are former driver Lyn St. James (center) and Janet Reno tennis great Billie Jean King.

I Was Supposed to Golf Today...Not So Sure

And Saturday's are slow posting days. Edit: Golf game canceled. Barry tears rolling down Barry cheeks.

All Brit. All The Time.

Oh, No, You Didn't!

From the best I can tell, an employee of Virgin Airlines decides to recreate the final scene of An Officer And A Gentleman by proposing to his girlfriend who works in (or shops in) a mall drug store. Let me get this right. He proposed to her next to the laxatives and skin cream? Makes me feel like the most romantic man in Wise County (west of Bridgeport, at least.)

Absolute Gold

Check out this sign in a protest march against Fort Worth students not being allowed to take part in graduation if they failed the TAKS test. (Source.)

"Let Are Kids Walk"

Construction Nears Completion

"The minute you enter the place, you will encounter the finest service and prime aged beef; a dining experience like no other. In fact, the unique atmosphere, combines the old world elegance of rich mahogany booths, a polished bar and white, crisp table linens with modern, business casual attire. Celebrated by a loyal, repeat clientele, as well as new customers seeking more than just a restaurant, This is a place they can call home. The clubby atmosphere is understated sophisticated, and lends itself to a variety of dining situations, from business meals to friends and family gatherings. From great food to the attentive and seasoned wait staff, it is sure to be a dining experienced unmatched."

Oh, wait. I screwed up. It's just the new Arby's in Decatur.

Court Of Appeals Decision Today

Some may remember a horrible accident and huge lawsuit in Wise County that involved the Randy Hughes family. (See DMN coverage here and Messenger coverage here.)

The Fort Worth Court of Appeals released a decision this morning in the case that is here, but you darn near need to be board certified in personal injury law to understand it. The one part I'm certain of, however, is that$6,658,000 in exemplary damages were taken away from the Plaintiffs. There could be more to it - I'll try to figure it out.

(That scurry of activity you hear is the Messenger's staff knocking each other down in order to put this in tomorrow's paper.)

My Sports Brain

I mentioned over a month ago that I thought "Ultimate Fighting" would overtake boxing in popularity some day. Sports Illustrated ponders the same thing this week.

I Just Spit Out My Coffee

The plans for a public law school in Dallas may die at midnight tonight, according to this story.

Hey, I don't want to see any new ones, either.

Tori Spelling . . .

. . . wishes all of Wise County a happy Friday morning. (This "good morning" schitck could be a pretty funny bit.)

Oh, My

First came breast augmentation and now comes . . . uh . . . link. You women are so vain! (From the D Magazine blog this morning. And I distance from all of this.)

I'm Hearing Things

I never listen to Paul Harvey (who has made a living off of reading the AP wire when now all of us have access to the AP wire). But I did a double take today when I stumbled across him during a commercial break on The Ticket.

After describing a guy at a nudist colony who was getting groceries out of his car and who decided to close the car door with his nude body, Harvey said, "A crowd gathered around the screams of pain. That's right, he had slammed the door on his . . . [insert pause] . . . tallywacker! . . . . [insert pause] . . . . Good Day!"

A question mark formed over my head as I slowly looked toward the radio dial. Yep, he said, "tallywacker."

I Thought . . .

that was a Vacation Bible School (VBS) shirt for a second.

Poop

I bird dropped a little sumtin' sumtin' on the President during his news conference yesterday (it was probably when he uttered the oft-used line of, "They'll follow us home.")

Anyway, they were replaying it on KXAS, Channel 5 this morning when Tammy Dombeck chimed in and said, "That's supposed to be good luck to have that happen to you!"

Say what?

I Swear On A Stack of Bibles . . .

. . . that I have never seen anyone in a Wise County courtroom (or any courtroom for that matter) have to swear on a Bible before they testify. Normally the judge just asks them, "Do you swear or affirm that the testimony that you are about to give . . . . "

(Fox News is all bent out of shape about the Koran story.)

My Favorite Head Shaking Moment From The President's Press Conference Today

Q Mr. President, why is [Osama bin Laden] still at large?

THE PRESIDENT: Why is he at large? Because we haven't got him yet, Jim. That's why. And he's hiding, and we're looking, and we will continue to look until we bring him to justice. We've brought a lot of his buddies to justice, but not him. That's why he's still at large.

Crappy Pic Of A Rhome Wreck Today

Looks like a tractor trailer "got loose" going around the bend in Rhome towards Fort Worth. Not sure what happened, but we had two huge tow trucks on the scene to get it out of the median with extra benefit of seeing a guy riding in the bucket of a backhoe (or whatever you call it.)

Weather Break

I missed the other night, but VH1 ran a documentary on Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes. Most of you remember her for being a member of TLC (they sang "Dont Go Chasin' Waterfalls"), but I remember her most for going crazy and burning down the mansion of then Atlanta Falcon Andre Rison (fire pic here).

Anyway, she died a few years back in a car wreck in Honduras. There was a video rolling in the car at the time. VH1 played that video.

Pete Delkus Has Nothing On Me

--Edit @ 12:48 p.m.: Hey, Jacksboro. Duck! --Edit @ 1:31 p.m.: Hey, Bridgeport. I predict rain. Hard. Now. --Edit @ 2:09 p.m.: In Decatur, it's as dark as a prosecutor's soul. --Edit @ 2:20 p.m.: NWS issues a "severe thunderstorm warning" for Erath County as heard on WBAP. No mention of Wise County. NWS is apparently on crack. --Edit @ 2:27 p.m.: Lord is striking Decatur with "great vengeance and furious anger" --Edit @ 2:53 p.m.: Confirmed that it's raining on the just and the unjust --Edit @ 4:01 p.m.: Tapering off. Emergency over. Take us to DEFCON 5.

Repost

I still laugh about the To Catch a Predator sound board.

Did A Double Take In My Parking Lot This Morning

I think they are headed to the dentist next door. (And that's an all female chain gang, by the way.)

Edit: For clarification, I think they are from the Bridgeport prison instead of the local Wise County jail.

In Honor Of . . .

. . . today's limited opening of Pirates Of The Caribbean, Part 3 (which will rob your family's bank account of money assuming you have any entertainment dollars left after Shrek 3.) I'll probably watch Busty Cops 3 on Cinemax.

The Day The Local News Died

If you didn't see it, I can't do it justice. The finals of American Idol were tonight which I have absolutely no interest in. But many of you do, and apparently Fox 4 News believes that 99% of its viewership cares about nothing else.

I always TIVO Fox 4's 9:00 o'clock news and watch it about an hour later. Dear lord, was it a disaster. Not only did they dedicate the first half hour whole hour (!) to this AI crap, but it was a technological meltdown of biblical proportions. Audio out, video feeds of stuff even the anchors couldn't explain, and the absolute train wreck that is Maria Sotolongo (who was placed in an incredibly difficult position of doing impromptu reporting that even a 20 year old veteran would have trouble doing - and she's a freaking weather girl thrown into reporting live from AI.)

I have never felt sadder for anchor Steve Eager who, at the 9:18 mark, was left hanging. "Alright, where are we going now?" he begged a producer. "Help me out . . . [silence]. We just wrapped up Celena [the last segment] . . . [insert fist mildly hitting desk with a look of absolute disgust in his eyes.]"

It was TV gold.

Male Patterned Baldness

Man, I have had two or three people tell me that I'm getting "thin on top." After a few decades of clean living and long flowing locks, I think I'm beginning to lose my hair.

And, IT IS FREAKING ME OUT.

Happy Birthday To Jewel

Although I really can't think of a song she has released in the last five years, and I'm pretty sure she still has jacked up teeth.

Legal Stuff

A lady dumps her newborn child in a dumpster in Jefferson County, Texas with his "arms . . . secured across his chest with duct tape." The child dies. A jury convicts her of capital murder and sentences her to death. In order to impose the death sentence, the jury had to find, as they did, that in the future she would "commit criminal acts of violence that would constitute a continuing threat to society." She had no criminal record.

Today, the highest Texas court reversed the punishment and held that she should instead be assessed life in prison. The reason: There was simply insufficient evidence that she would be a continuing threat. Or, put another way, any rational juror would have had a reasonable doubt about that issue.

Wow. That's a 5-4 decision by an all Republican court that had been as pro-State as the Third Reich for the last 15 years. I have no idea what is going on other than perhaps even the hard-liners are beginning to question the way we impose the death penalty in this country.

(Opinion is here. News story is here. )

Preach On, Bruther

"But [Ricky] Williams is seemingly just a harmless and hopeless pothead on the verge of being drug-tested out of the league because NFL powers-that-be have declared marijuana to be evil. I can just hear the NFL muckety-mucks now as they sit at the big mahogany bar at the owners meeting ordering single-malt scotches and vodka martinis and lamenting to each other, "Why in the world does Ricky Williams need marijuana to get through the day?" - Mike Bianchi of the Orlando Sentinel

.08

That's the legal limit for Texas in DWI. Over the years (many years, that is), I've seen lots of cases between .10 and .19, and a couple of times a year I'll see something between .20 and .29 (that's pretty rare, and normally gets everybody's attention.) I saw one case over .30 when I was a prosecutor in the Tarrant County DA's office and that was my first year there. I kind of wish I could look at the file again - I didn't know it was going to be such a rarity. I have always heard that "over .40" can kill you. I honestly can't recall a specific situation where I've seen that to be true. But today I read about one in Dallas.

I Wonder If His Buddies Finished Out The Round?

The guy works hard all his life. Probably a model citizen. Showed up to work even when sick. Put in some overtime. Had to listen to a crappy boss yell at him all day. Stocked away his cash in a 401(k). All so that he could reach 65, retire, and play a little golf with his buddies.

And then this happens.

And for all of you that have driven a golf cart in a crazy and careless way (which is all of us), this is our biggest fear. You know I'm right.

Hey, Now

Jessica Alba's promo poster for her upcoming movie, "Good Luck Chuck."

Catfight!

Rosie and Hasselcrack Fight! Uploaded by TheDlisted

From today's The View. It's about 6:00 minutes long but it's good stuff. And I think I was strangely turned on. Edit: Sheesh, this is the topic on Larry King Live tonight. But I did learn that ABC decided not to not go to a commercial break during this argument. Who ever made that decision knows exactly what they are doing.

And She Even Uses Just One Ski!

A loyal reader passes along that former Wise Countian Michelle Simpson, who polished her water skiing skills on the mean streets of Lake Bridgeport, will be competing in the 48th U.S. Masters in Waterskiing & Wakeboarding at Callaway Gardens in Pinedale, Ga. this weekend. Michell is currently ranked 4th in the world by the IWSF (International WaterSki Federation).

If so inclined, learn more here. (She will perform at around 10:00 a.m. on Saturday with a live webcast.)

I Think . . .

. . .Mark Cuban might be a third grader.

I'm Offended By This

WBAP

Funny moment a second ago on WBAP. Sports guy Steve Lamb teases an upcoming segment with Tom Hicks. Hicks owns a soccer team in Liverpool which apparently is playing in the equivalent of the Super Bowl today in Greece. Lamb even points out that there will be a "Watching Party" of the game at the AAC beginning at 11:00 a.m. today.

So Hicks comes on the radio about 10 minutes later and past-his-prime DJ Hal Jay introduces him and says, "Tom Hicks live from Greece . . . So how did your team do?"

Insert incredibly awkward pause here. Then Hicks points out, "Uh, the game's tonight."

I think Hal Jay was so embarrassed that he couldn't even do his wheeze laugh.

Edit: I wasn't there, but people actually showed up to that watching party. And, by the way, I bet the Victory Plaza (or whatever) is cool.

Politics and Criminal Justice

An illegal immigrant got a 15 year sentence yesterday from a judge in Tarrant County in an intoxication manslaughter case. This caught my eye: "The national events of the day, with border security, were brought home in this case," prosecutor Miles Brissette said "Had this defendant not been in this country illegally, the victim in this case would still be alive today, most likely." Just a guess, but Miles might get called into his boss's office today and told, "You might want to keep politics out of your statements to the press." (This was the exact same issue that caused the huge blow up between Bill O'Reilly and Geraldo Rivera a few weeks back.) The story also highlights the strange world of criminal justice sentencing in Texas. The range of punishment was 2 to 20 years. Didn't a white guy get a 3 1/2 year sentence in an Intoxication Manslaughter case a couple of weeks ago by a plea bargain after a jury had found him guilty?

Finally Got To Me

Maria Sotolongo is Fox 4's "on the scene" reporter for coverage of American Idol. The lady thinks she's covering the cure on cancer. Annoying. And she's listed on the station's web site as "Weather Anchor."

Not Sure About This

I just learned this blog archives every photo I upload. And keeps them here and here.

This Is Myleene Klass

I'm not sure who she is. I've heard she's from Alvord. But I bet that's a lie.

What The?

So I'm sitting here with the Ranger game on in the background and hear something that instantly causes me to grab the TIVO remote and hit rewind. Broadcaster Tom Grieve is recalling his first grand slam with play-by-play man Josh Lewin as the Rangers are batting in the 7th.

Josh Lewin : Who did you [hit it off of]?

Tom: It was in Seattle. Mike Kekich . . . I ended up playing winter ball with him a couple of years in Venezuela. Great guy . . . Pretty good pitcher, too. Unfortunately for Mike, he was probably [sic] his big league career being know as the guy that switched wives with Fritz Peterson back in the '70s.

Josh Lewin: Yeah, that was an uncomfortable moment for the sport. [With a tone of incredible tension.]

Tom: Both Fritz and Mike ended up at one time pitching for the Rangers. Both of them started with the Yankees - that's when they had their wife swapping incident. We always kidded Kekich that the reason it didn't work out with Fritz Peterson's wife [was] because she had to take such a pay cut to come to Kekich . Whereas Kekich 's wife went to Fritz Peterson who was making three times as much money.

[After a few awkward jokes]

Josh Lewin : I'm really glad I asked you who you hit your first grand slam off of.

OMG.

Edit: I've learned the incident made the #6 most shocking moment in the MLB history according to ESPN.

Inside The Evil Empire

This won't appeal to all of you, but it's a youtube.com clip of Texas' coach Mack Brown's post game locker room speech after their National Championship win a year and a half ago.

Thoughts:
- I cannot believe Brown would let Matthew McConaughey inside the locker room, much less recognize him
- I have no idea what chant Vince Young does with about a minute left in the clip
- Brown gets credit for saying, "Don't let this be the most important thing that ever happens in your life."

If You Haven't Heard . . .

. . . whether Arlington/Dallas will host the 2011 Super Bowl, think about a drumroll and click here. Edit: Found this elsewhere: "If you listened, I found it quite humorous that Jerry Jones did not thank Laura Miller by name while thanking [Fort Worth Mayor Mike] Moncrief and Arlington's mayor [Dr. Kenneth Noisewater] specifically by name. Instead he thanked 'Dallas City Government.'" Edit #2: (From the Dallas Morning News)

The voting was by secret ballot.

Mr. Jones declined to discuss the voting, beyond saying that it went to the maximum fourth ballot. (On the first three ballots, the votes of three-fourths of the owners are needed. After that, it becomes a simple-majority contest between the two top contenders.)

Jim Irsay, owner of the Colts, said he was told the final vote was 17-15 in favor of North Texas.

Cue The "Bad Boy" Theme

Actually, Sheriff David Walker reports that Cahill heard there was a warrant for him on "a local radio station" and he turned himself into in to [edit: grammar police duly noted] the Bowie Police Department.

Missed This Yesterday

The 12 year old girl who had been missing after allegedly being sexually assaulted in Jacksboro, has been found safe and alive.

Luckiest Son In History Of Ever

How In The World Did I Miss This In Sunday School?

What is Christian Domestic Discipline?

A domestic discipline marriage is one in which one partner in the marriage is given authority over the other and has the means to back the authority, usually by spanking.

A Christian Domestic Discipline marriage is one that is set up according to Biblical standards; that is, the husband is the authority in the household. The wife is submissive to her husband as is fit in the Lord and her husband loves her as himself. He has the ultimate authority in his household, but it is tempered with the knowledge that he must answer to God for his actions and decisions. He has the authority to spank his wife for punishment, but in real CDD marriages this is taken very seriously and usually happens only rarely. CDD is so much more than just spanking. It is the husband loving the wife enough to guide and teach her, and the wife loving the husband enough to follow his leadership. Source.

Oh, My

You would think the Preakness Stakes, being part of the Triple Crown, would be a little high tone. Uh, no. Unless you call guys running across the tops of port-o-pottys and being pelted with beer cans high tone. Edit: And here's a shorter and more violent clip from the same event. It's like watching the Zapruder film.

I'm Pretty Sure That's Won't Be Rodeo Exchange Any Time Soon

Time magazine just landed on my desk with this article on p. 55: "The Lavender Heart of Texas: How once conservative Dallas has quietly become one the nation's most gay friendly cities." (This pic accompanied the headline.)

Topless Bar Gets Fourth Death This Year

I've mentioned this club in south Fort Worth before (links therein are dead.) Earlier this year, the cops chased a guy into it and killed him in a bathroom. And about a month later a guy goes in there and shoots a stripper (and then kills himself.)

Last night, an Everman guy was killed in the parking lot.

Let's make it a road trip this weekend.

Robbing The Hood

The Messenger's Update is reporting that Bridgeport ISD has now become a "property rich" school and, as a consequence, will be sending big bags of local tax money to the State for redistribution. You've got to be kidding.

This Guy . . .

. . . really annoys me. I can't ever listen to what he's saying because of his delivery. (And I think his attack of Ron Paul in the last debate was cheap.)

Tuesday Morning Pick Me Up

Girl sets up home made dancing pole in room. Carnage ensues. Puppy horrified. And she kind of lets out a Tony Soprano like "owwwwwww". Good times. (Warning: The girl is topless but she amazingly stays covered up.) Link: 23 second video clip. Edit: It reminded me of this, which is one of my all time favorites.

Man Wishes To Rethink Choices Right About Now

Fox 4 News had a story tonight on the arrest of an engaged couple for alleging "engaging" in very inappropriate acts with a 13 year old girl. (Arrests like this happen every day, but it made Fox 4, I suppose, because they had cameras there to film the arrest. That makes for good TV.)

The guy had an insurance agency for Nationwide (I bet they're pleased). And the 45 year old male also had a 20 year old girlfriend. Sir!

Edit: And then it dawned on me that 52 year old Bruce Willis is dating a 23 year old Playboy model named Tamara Witmer. That's completely different.

Eva Longoria . . .

. . . is all over the Internet playing volleyball today, but my "Family First" policy prevents me from posting the pic. Instead, here's Brit performing in Orlando this weekend. (My policy doesn't prevent me from telling you that it is bigger if you click on it.)

I've Wondered About This

The other day, someone in my office was slightly offended that I didn't call her back. She had left a message on my cell phone to alert me to a huge traffic jam on 287 since she knew I was headed to Fort Worth. I appreciated the call, but she wanted to know why I didn't call her back.

I told her it was the type of phone call that didn't require a return call. What was I supposed to say? "Got your message. Thanks." Yeah, that would have been polite but isn't that a waste of time?

Which gave rise to the above question today on a computer/life productivity site called LifeHacker. If you ask a question via email and get a response, do you type a one word email of "thanks" and hit reply? Unless someone has gone to a heck of a lot of trouble to find an answer for me, I don't. And I know I'm a good person. My therapist tells me so.

Deal Or No Deal

I hate this show. What should be done in 15 minutes takes an hour. But I stumbled across the last 10 minutes of it tonight which, I admit, was interesting.

A guy (I think he was the "subway hero") was down to three cases. The amounts remaining were $25, $10,000 and $1,000,000.

He could walk away with a guaranteed pay day of $305,000. He refused. I actually yelled, "Idiot!" at the screen.

The next case he chose to be eliminated was ..................... $1,000,000.

With two cases left ($25 and $10,000) he was offered $5,000 to walk away. He refused. Idiot.

So what does he end up with? $25. (Although Chrysler gave him a crappy car as a consolation prize.)

Shout Out . . .

. . . to www.BagOfNothing.com who has three great youtube clips on his site right now (cute dog playing catch, an amazing lightening strike of a tree, and a "circle of life" video that is absolutely incredible if you'll give it a chance.) Good times.

I Haven't . . .

. . . posted anything from PostSecret for a while, but this one got my attention. You know, the Asian girl does have a little sumtin' sumtin'.

The Sheriff's Office is P.O.'d

They have just released this photo in connection with the fire at Twin Hills Restaurant. That, as you may recall, seriously damaged the available catfish and hush puppies in this county. The deputies are not pleased.

Struck Me As Ironic

A guy on the one of the normally spare Dallas Morning News blogs had about four rants from this weekend. Here was #2: 2) The guy in the church parking lot in Mesquite, appearing out of nowhere and hitting me up for "gas" money just as I was leaving my granddaughter's dance recital. In front of my granddaughter! It's a CHURCH! Yeah, what's the world coming to? The thought of giving the poor some money in front of a church!

Obligatory Jack County Pic From This Morning

Literally, the last picture show.

Edit: I forgot to mention that I paid $3.28 for gas today in Jacksboro. Sheesh.

When Britney Gets In A Bikini

I'm gonna post it

That Couch Is Looking Mighty Good

The NFL will announce tomorrow whether Dallas will get to host the 2011 Super Bowl. In reading Rick Gosselin's story about in in the DMN, this tidbit struck me as amazing: Last year's face value of a Super Bowl ticket was around $600 and is expected to rise to $900 a piece by 2011. Wow.