Oh, By The Way, A Hurricane Is Headed Through This Afternoon

After I staggered into my living room this morning before the sun came up, I turned on the TV and saw Channel 5's weather gal "Jennifer Lopez." She was matter of factly telling us that we had a good chance for rain this afternoon and then, without the slightest bit of urgency, said, "And we could see winds as high as 50 to 60 miles per hour later today." Huh? First of all, that's not going to happen. Secondly, how can you possibly either believe that or, if you do, how can you not be excited about it? I mean, Pete Delkus will take us to DEFCON 1 at the chance of pea size hail. That man knows how to play up sensationalism. Because it's not enough to simply make those claims, you've got to put a little bit of panic in your voice. Maybe, just for grins, point at a part of the map and say "I expect a storm to develop here that might very well have a hook on the back side that that good destroy Camp Bowie Boulevard if the conditions become just right." Anyway, JLo, I've been looking at my Walmart barametric-pressue-reader-thingy and those winds aren't going to happen. Now watch it happen. I think I'll go reinforce my crank lab just to be safe.