Nerd Humor

I run Windows Vista on my laptop at home and, stay with me here, I always get a warning that my "recovery drive D:" is close to capacity. In searching for a way to make the error message go away, I was told that I might want to consider "compressing the drive". I did so, and then got this message about the status as to how long it would take. I did a screen grab to capture it.

Saturday Morning Pick Me Up . .

. . . as I wonder how a fantasy football draft turned into a journey into a forest on an amphibious vehicle with eight wheels that overheated and then could not turn to the right. Good times. But I think I broke my coccyx.

From The Email Bag:

If I've ever needed the Liberally Lean Army to come through with a pic, this is it!! Don't fail me people!! Edit: Faithful reader "E. R. Slade" sends in this effort (good try): But I sent that photo into my CSI lab and the magic of technology revealed this enhanced image: A reader now sends in a pic of the new tattoo parlor.

Follow Up From Yesterday

Not that he didn't deserve the sentence, but most of the evidence indicates no one really gave a rat's arse about him as a kid. Which got me to thinking, we all go crazy when we watch parents be bad parents or, worse, absentee parents. And our universal concern is that if we don't nurture a child at every moment, bending over backwards to teach right from wrong, that "the child won't stand a chance" when he grows up. But when that neglected child does grow up and, as predicted, acts just like we thought he would because he never had a chance, we come down on him like a ton of bricks. Yeah, double murder is a bad example but let's put it in the context of other crimes. Drug use. Theft. Assault. We, as a society, just turn our noses up at the "bad childhood defense" when, right now, we can go out to Walmart in Decatur and point out 10 kids that are guaranteed to be in the criminal justice system.

Hey, It's A Profit Thing

After proclaiming I couldn't name one Lyle Lovett song the other day, a faithful reader (whom I don't think I've ever met) sent this to me. I'd now like to proclaim I've never had a Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader knock on my door on a Friday evening.

Be Aware Of This Girl

She allegedly had drug paraphernalia on her in Denton last night!!!!

Random Friday Morning Thoughts

• Saw a shot this morning of the inside of the Cowboys Stadium with the football field on it. Cool.
• Inglourious Basterds opens today. It looks like something I'd be interested in but, then again, I get sucked in by anything Tarantino does.
• Someone else's kindness is impacting my selfishness.
• Did ya see where that Bolt guy ran a world record 19.19 second 200 meter yesterday? And he doesn't even look like he tries. Breaking news: He's fast.
• Ok, this is the most tense video to watch in the history of ever. It's called "Drunk Girl vs. Glass Table." (And it contains a couple of F bombs so be warned.) But after you recover from the 1:20 seconds of stress, you'll realize you've learned a new dance: "Percolating."
• I've practiced criminal law for almost 20 years and I've never heard a cop, prosecutor, or anyone connected with the system refer to someone as a "perp."
• On reports of school supplies this mornings, I heard a reference to "trapper" something on two different channels. Have no idea what they are talking about. Edit: Yep, "Trapper Keeper". I think I'm the only person in the world that had no idea what it was.
• I was in a convenience store this morning that was extremely inconvenient. And, not that it's that big of a deal, but the clerk never spoke.
• The Update this morning has news that Decatur ISD has a new touchy-feely "commencement walk across the stage but don't graduate" policy.
• The Lockerbie Bomber who was released yesterday sure did return to a hero's welcome. You would think that Libya, which has made efforts to be in our good graces over the last few years, would have throttled that back a bit.
• Before conservative commenters Wordkyle, Jarhead, and Denny Crane were here, there was a guy name ReaganRIP. He got mad one day when someone impersonated him, and he never came back.
• Favorite overnight email: "Are the commentors on your blog acting more crazy lately?"

Thursday Afternoon Pick Me Up

I don't know who this Heidi Montag chick is other than she's on some reality show on MTV or VH1 or Bravo or the Cheese Channel, but I cannot turn on the Internets without her popping onto my screen. It's like a good virus or something. Anyway, here she is "practicing for the Miss Universe contest on Saturday night" which completely confuses me. But if Britney ever has an unfortunate demise, I've got this gal on standby to assume the #1 status.

I Am Persuaded

It's about time PETA learned how to advertise effectively. For years we've been bombarded with horrific pictures of tortured chickens or antics like having blood thrown on fur coats. But no more. Now they are embracing a concept we all love and hold dear: Tone Women. Well, PETA, I'm officially on board. Where's my application and where do I send my money? And just tell me which dove lease you want me to protest on Labor Day, and I'm there. Eat meat? No peace!

Once Again, I'm A Friend Of Law Enforcement

Note to Wise County deputies: If you get the urge to let a hot waitress sit on a patrol car holding your AR-15, resist the desire. It will get you fired. (At least it will if you do it in Williamson County and a Round Rock police officer, who really needs to mind his own business, starts an investigation.)

Las Vegas Line: Death Penalty

This guy got my attention last year when he gave a jailhouse interview after killing a couple of innocent folks in Garland. (Video, with extreme language, here.) This guy has been presenting himself as the poster child for the Death Penalty ever since he got caught. Wheels. Off. Big Time. Well, his trial is taking place with the only issue left for the jury, after conviction, is whether he should live or die. Deliberations begin today. I've been thinking that the death penalty is a foregone conclusion, but these times they are a changing. I'm not sure anything is a slam dunk anymore especially in Dallas County. And if he gets Life instead of Death, there might be a pretty big firestorm. It kind of flew under the radar, but after the jury was selected, which turned out to be all white, the judge took one of the white jurors off and replaced him with a black guy ( a black guy that the State had used one of its free "kick him off the jury" strikes on.) This was done simply because the judge said it seemed "unfair" for Broadnax to be judged by an all-white jury even though the judge also ruled that the State's reason for striking the black guy off the panel were legal and "race neutral." (Side note: How in the world did they end up with an all white jury in Dallas County?)

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• After Pudge Rodriquez got a hit at his first at bat last night since his return to the Rangers, play by play man Josh Lewin said, "3 hits out of his last 3 at bats for Texas over a span of 7 years."
• Pudge went on to make it 5 for 5.
• But my predicted Rangers fade might be beginning. (They've blown leads of 5 and 4 runs over the last two days.)
• Re: The lady at the Barney Frank's town hall meeting speaking at the podium while holding a picture of Obama with a Hitler mustache which prompted Frank to say, "What planet are you from?" When the nutcases can make Frank like good, they might wish to rethink their strategy. Edit: Here's the video.
• A caller to KLIF this morning called Obama a Muslim.
• I'm already tired of the Perry v. Hutchison governor's race and it's just started. But, man, she's looking frumpy at all of her appearances.
• Wow. The attendance last night at the McCartney concert was 38,000 because they didn't sell seats in the upper deck at the Cowboys Stadium. [Edit: Source was Fox 4 News this morning.] What's up with that? And the big high def screen wasn't in use either.
• Here's a twitpic of the stage setup.
• I would think it would be "Cowboys' Stadium" but it's just "Cowboys Stadium."
• This is one fast woman. Or a man. Or a woman.
• I almost got ran over in my office parking lot this morning by a woman driving a small silver car.
• Storms this evening? Yay!!
• There was a suicide in Decatur over the weekend.
• My crazy laundry lady is still there. Now she's commenting on my mannerism (where I stand, if I play with the phone, how I dress for work.) Stop it.
• I roll my eyes whenever a psychiatrist testifies at a criminal trial about whether a defendant is a "sociopath" or has any other mental condition.
• I thought that oil prices and natural gas prices, the latter which is important to Wise County, pretty much shadowed one another. Apparently that's not true as natural gas hit its lowest price since 2002 yesterday.
• Stay with me here: The Star-Telegram's Randy Galloway reported yesterday that MLB is now basically running the Texas Rangers due to owner Tom Hicks financial woes. (It had earlier been reported that MLB had loaned the Rangers money.) An interesting aspect of the story is that this "news" was buried in Galloway's "opinion column." Why? The Star-Telegram and the Dallas Morning News, in a cost cutting measure, have an agreement to share sports news stories. But they don't agree to share opinion pieces. See what they did there?
• Galloway on the radio is painful to listen to.
• Why don't we consider health care to be a civil right?
• Getting kids set up for the start of school seems like a beating. And running around looking for a particular color of a particular type of spiral notebook would put me over the edge.

What The?

Story. (History.) Compassionate grounds? Sheesh. Where's Ronald Reagan when you need him? First, he'd blow the plane that this little bomber is taking (to wherever it is he is going) completely out of the sky. Then he'd head back to Libya and take care of the business that was left unfinished by bombing ol' Muammar al-Gaddafi's tent to oblivion. And then, in a move that would remind the world what a "Super Power" was, he'd start bombing Scotland until they screamed "Freedom" at the top of their collective lungs. Man, I miss the good old days.

"I Can't Live" / "Ken Lee"

A buddy just sent me this, and it didn't really grab me at first. But, the more I thought about it, the more I laughed. (And, yeah, I've seen the Britney Top Ten from Letterman last night, but it's so bad that I can't subject you to it if you haven't seen it.)

Slow Wednesday: Rate The Newly Released Bass Hall Schedule

Oct. 24: Marc Broussard and special guest Caitlin Crosby - Never heard of them.

Nov. 2: Doobie Brothers - Without Michael McDonald? No way

Nov. 3: Chanticleer - Never heard of them. Cool name.

Nov. 14: Rufus Wainwright with Police Woman - Never heard of them. Cooler name.

Nov. 17: ABBA Mania - Probably an ABBA cover band. My mind is mush from hearing "Mamma Mia" on cable for the last six months.

Nov. 24-25: Lyle Lovett & His Large Band - I can't name a single song he sings.

Dec. 14: Michael Martin Murphey’s "Cowboy Christmas" - I was out at "Cowboy"

Dec. 15: Wynonna: A Classic Christmas - 1/2 of the Judds is 1/2 of the Christmas

Dec. 30: Robert Earl Keen - Wise County Night at Bass Hall

Feb. 22: The Band of the Irish Guards and the Pipes, Drums and Highland Dancers of the Royal Regiment of Scotland - I bet, of all the shows, this is pretty good.

Feb. 23: Frankie Valli & the Four Seasons - Also known as "Ears Bleeding Night".

Feb. 24: TAO: The Martial Art of Drumming - I wouldn't mind seeing this.

Mar. 2-4: The Gershwins’ Porgy and Bess - That's just too high tone for me.

Mar. 22: Los Lobos and Leo Kottke - I know one song! I know one song!

Mar. 23: Joe Bonamassa - A question mark just formed over my head.

Mar. 25: What It Is! Featuring Mavis Staples, Booker T. Jones and JJ Grey - I almost bought tickets when I thought it read Booker T and the MG's.

Source.

Fire Near Alvord?

I've gotten a couple of reports that it is "pretty big." Anyone?

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts

• At least 75 are dead in Baghdad this morning. "Mission Accomplished" was when?
• Pudge Rodriguez has lost a lot of weight. But I think we all know why.
• I suppose that the civil unrest felt in this country is similar to what was felt in the Sixties except now the public is too fat and lazy to get out an protest.
• For a hurricane that will never touch land, Bill sure is getting a lot of attention.
• The Wise County Commissioners are setting the current budget. During my first year as DA, I voluntarily cut $10,000 (or was it $5,000?) due to a line item that read "Outside Appellate Attorney" that I didn't need. I bet I am the only elected official in this county in the last 50 years to cut their budget on their own. And I was elected as a Democrat.
• I just bragged a little bit. I apologize.
• What hotel do you think Paul McCartney is staying in tonight?
• Someone wrote me and said this Explorer patch for Wise County has some unusual markings on it. I don't know enough about history to understand. Edit: Patch in context on county web site.
• I've got a live Fantasy Football draft in Paradise this weekend. The draft is probably more fun than the season is.
• I bet un-re-re-retired and now Minnesota Viking Brett Favre doesn't even start for the last half of season. His skills have diminished, he's a year older, he's coming off shoulder surgery, and he has a torn rotator cuff. Maybe we'll get to see a mid-season tearful re-re-re-retirement.
• Caller to KLIF this morning on the issue of whether we should be spending or saving, "If it don't go 'bang' and I can't reload it, I ain't buying it right now." Good grief.
• There was tremendous outrage when Texas appellate judge Sharon Keller allegedly shut down the Court of Criminal Appeals preventing a last minute appeal of a death row inmate. Over the last two days, her ethics hearing has been going on and you hardly have heard a peep about it.

Armondo's In Decatur Serving Sushi?

(Thanks, Kat.)

Funny and True

Credit.

Well I'll Be: Guess Who Is Coming Back To The Rangers?

Source.

Tuesday Afternoon Pick Me Up

That's Michelle Keegan. Who is Michelle Keegan you ask? I have no idea.

District 9: The Sequel

I'm not exactly sure what the purpose is of the new street repair around the courthouse in Decatur. It seems the go about two blocks away from the square, tearing up the road next to the curb (but not the curb itself), and then placing a brick crosswalk in at the farthest (furthest?) point away. But it's finally heading toward my office, so I'll take it.

Tuesday Morning Pick Me Up -- The Different Kind

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts

• I've heard for years that most money in the U.S. has cocaine residue on it, and yesterday there was a new report putting that number at 90%. I don't believe that. At all.
• It's extremely rare to even see a cocaine criminal case these days.
• KXAS's Jane McGarry said last night at 6:00 that Sen. Kay Baily Hutchison officially "threw her name in the hat" for Texas Governor. Uh, isn't that "threw her hat in the ring?"
• Frequent commenter Denny Crane says if he wants to call our President a "nigger", he will. Good lord, man. Throttle back! Throttle back!
• Over at the Morning News web site this morning, they had a "Live Blog" covering something called Plano ISD's Convocation (which sounds like a pep rally for all of the teachers.) It started at 7:00 or so and included school board members being led in by cheerleaders. That would power me down.
• And that live blog posted this thrilling poll: "Are you ready for the 2009-2010 school year to begin?" After it had been up for over an hour, no one had responded.
• Outliers, which I promote constantly, made the case for year round schools.
• Watched a bit of Hard Knocks on HBO (the documentary about preseason training camps, this time with the Cincinnati Bengals.) Former Cowboy Roy Williams was schooled in a drill getting knocked on his back but, after the fact, wasn't even embarrassed by it. Good riddance.
• Woodstock looked like it would have been a beating. I don't do crowds. I don't do mud. I don't do bad music.
• Y.E. Yang, who bested Tiger Woods this weekend and who lives in Southlake, speaks no English.
• Ticket Fans only.
• Yesterday we had Britney in a pink bikini, today we've got a new color. Love that girl.
• Did the ol' slice the thumb with a knife in the kitchen trick last night. But it wasn't too bad.
• Last night was the deadline to sign players from this year's Major League Baseball draft. The first pick signed for a record $15 million. The Rangers failed to sign their high school pick who now heads to TCU. To paraphrase Dale Hansen from many years ago, "The kid needs an education."
• Reader's Digest filed for bankruptcy reorganization. I liked it as a kid, but haven't read it since then (unless I was stuck at a doctor's office.)
• The Obama kids always look like they are having the time of their lives

Squirrel Photo Bomber

I thought this was fake, but the couple in the background were on The Today Show this morning telling me differently. And, of course, we have to photoshop the squirrel into other pics.

The Kid That Caught Two Foul Balls At The Same At Bat

Unfortunately, we have about 55 seconds of Jim Knox not wanting to shut up, and 10 seconds (if that) of the kid catching the ball.

I'm No Construction Guy

. . . but a garden hose hooked up to a fire hydrant seems like a bad idea. (On the square in Decatur -- it was already leaking big time.)

I Was Half Asleep Yesterday . .

. . .when I looked up at the TV screen (showing the Little League World Series) and saw some kid with the graphic underneath him that read, "Luke Ramirez, 6'2", 205 pounds. 13 years old." Good grief. I wasn't dreaming. It's some kid named Luke Ramirez out of California and, trust me, this picture does not do him justice.

Definition of "Odd"

A guy strikes a bicyclist head on in Grand Praire, the cyclist ends up going through the back windshield, the driver decides it's a good idea to park his car with the body in it near his home, and to hide under a neaby car. Story.

Jerry Jones Meets A Monkey

And I noticed that after the Cowboys played the Raiders on Thursday nights, that the Oakland A's, who play in the same stadium, had to compete with the football line markings in the outfield. Unstable.

Random Monday Morning Thoughts

• New candidates for Dancing With The Stars have been announced this morning. It includes a former Texas Congressman and a former Dallas Cowboy.
• Ranger Ian Kinsler almost got killed with a fastball to the head on Saturday night. (Great quality video here.)
• A lot of people tell me to watch Mad Men but I really don't know anything about it.
• We've still got a five year wait until Southwest can fly out of Love Field and not first stop in a neighboring state.
• Seventy-seven banks have failed this year, but no one seems to care. This country is so odd because no matter what happens, there's this "everything will be all right" attitude.
• I've stopped buying a daily paper.
• Britney in a pink bikini this weekend. Hey, now.
• For some reason those Bill Kurtis AT&T ads really bug me.
• Former Red Raider Michael Crabtree has yet to sign with the Oakland Raiders. I don't think that guy is very smart. Edit: Apparently I'm not very smart since I said "Raiders" instead of 49ers.
• Funny protest sign.
• My back pain went away over the week. That's good. Really good.
• I stayed out too late on Saturday. It used to not impact me on Sunday. I think those days are gone.
• Weekend sports shockers: Rangers lead in Wild Card (it's all about pitching), Tiger blows a fourth round lead in a major (way to let a South Korean beat us), and we have a new 100 meters world record (but you can't really use that skill anywhere else, can you?).
• Looks like the "public option" for health care is dying a slow death.
• I've never really thought much about "falling rocks" signs, but this horrible incident in Colorado makes me rethink that.