Do These Look Like A Couple Of Burglars Who Would Use A Permanent Marker To Make A Disguise?

Why, yes. Yes, it does. That's a poor effort there, fellas. I'm worried about this new generation of kids if this is the best they have to offer.

Random Friday Morning Thoughts

  • When anyone is forced to submit to "diversity training", I don't have much hope that it will take.
  • Chris Berman Applebee's commercial = Beating.
  • My ranking of scariest movies: (1) The Exorcist, (2) Halloween, (3) The Blair Witch Project, (4) Rosemary's Baby.
  • I don't get too excited about the NFL, but I'm interested in watching Brett Farvvvrrraaaa return to Green Bay on Sunday. I love tension.
  • "Prominent" Houston plaintiff's attorney John O'Quinn died yesterday in a traffic accident. He made most of his money off of breast implant litigation (which one of my close lawyer friends involved in that litigation called "more like extortion than practicing law.")
  • O'Quinn was also involved in the bizarre "what to do with Anna Nicole Smith's body" case before the goofy judge in Florida. I was so horrified by his performance at the time that I wrote about it here.
  • And O'Quinn was one of five hand picked lawyers to split the $3.3 billion fee in Texas' litigation against tobacco companies. That whole thing was so seedy that former Texas Attorney General Dan Morales went to federal prison for his wrongdoing.
  • But I have no idea if he was a good guy or not.
  • Allen High School has 638 members in its high school band, and it takes 18 buses and three trucks to transport them?
  • This is hard to explain, but I stumbled upon a metroplex high school game on TV last night (Channel 21 or 27?). It was halftime, they were promoting - on the sideline - some radio station at 93-point-something, and then they cut to a shocking dance competition of hot girls of a local club. Did I mention this was a high school game telecast?
  • I wouldn't mind going to some church's "Hell House" because I'd like to see how Wheels Off it has become.
  • I think Cowboys WR Roy Williams is a complete bust. And his attitude drives me insane.
  • A 20 something Fort Worth teacher received probation from a jury for sex with an 18 year old student (an act that is only illegal because of the teacher-parent student relationship.) But the judge, who I've always thought was extremely uptight, gave the guy 180 days in jail as a condition of the probation.
  • A baseball player gets killed when struck by a ball and his parents sue. Well, they just won almost a million dollars from the obvious culprit: The aluminum bat manufacturer.

10.29.2009

Trench Coat Mafia? Naaaaa

Read more. Denny Crane was on this story yesterday, but I'm not sure it is much of a story. I can't tell if the "threats" were made last February or if they were referring to potential actions for February, 2010. Somebody read that story and figure it out. There's a huge difference between an "I'll kill you" said in anger (my third ex-wife used to say that whenever I would get handsy) and a Columbine Looney Toons Crazy Kid. But schools and cops freak out whenever they hear about stuff like this.

Ring Of Fire

Just finished an article in this month's Texas Monthly about the Aggie bonfire tragedy which, amazingly, is coming up on its 10 year anniversary. The entire piece is composed of quotes from those that were there or from those who could place some historical context to it. That sounded stuffy. There's some moving, moving stuff in that article. ("I was assigned to a kid who was trapped inside the stack. I remember I was pretty freaked out because the only thing that was keeping this kid from being crushed by a log was the body of the kid next to him.") God bless the Aggies. I remember two days after the accident that the Dallas Morning News had a horrific photo of the collapse. I'll try and find it.

Thursday Afternoon Pick Me Up

This girl might be to classy for Liberally Lean.

Costume Fail Thursday

Let's see. Spandex Man? Overweight Spiderman? Insane Clown Posse guy? Decisions. Decisions.

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

  • It's been a crazy baby week for the blogroll over to the right. Silicone Alley had her first baby, and yesterday BagOfNothing announced that Mrs. BagOfNothing was pregnant for the first time. The only way this gets better is if Crazy Texas Mommy surprises us with an announcement.
  • Dick Cheney endorses Kay Bailey Hutchison and she's happy about it?
  • Edit: WBAP's Mark Davis called Dick Cheney "a modern day Winston Churchill" this morning at 8:40 a.m. Really? Davis on crack?
  • Crazy picture of a criminal defendant in a Fort Worth trial. He's either worried about the swine flu or everyone else is worried about him spitting on them so they put a "spit mask" on him. It happens.
  • Ugh. I lost my DWI case yesterday. I tell you when I win so I might as well tell you when I lose. But driving two miles on a closed lane on 380 wasn't a good factual start to the case. But I really liked my client.
  • But I was in the courthouse bathroom early that morning and looked in the mirror and instantly thought about Keanu Reeves in the Devil's Advocate.
  • I swear I heard a young girl talking on a cell phone (loudly) on the square in Decatur yesterday afternoon say the following in a gleeful manner: "I feel so sorry for your mom. You're sixteen and you drink, smoke, and have sex. I mean even if your parents let you, they shouldn't know that you do that."
  • The president of DART said that next year's UT/OU game would be a night game, and the Dallas Morning News just reported it without a second thought. Then all hades broke loose in the college football world as both schools denied it. I bet the DART president (1) isn't a bright man and (2) was thinking about the Cotton Bowl Classic that will be played in 2011 for the first time at night in Arlington.
  • Cold front coming through today? Yay. But the three feet of snow in Colorado makes me want to go skiing for the first time in years.
  • President Obama went to Dover Air Force Base at midnight last night to watch the caskets of our dead soldiers from Afghanistan be removed from a transport plane. I hope that influences his decision making.
  • If there is bacon on your burger, you probably shouldn't be eating it.
Oops. Comments were turned off by accident. Fixed.

10.28.2009

Another Reason I Didn't Have Kids

Just my luck little Barry Jr. would get laid out and then start crying like a baby.

Men WIth Chainsaws And Attitudes

For the last few weeks, whatever company owns the powerlines in Decatur has sent crews around to cut back any trees that might interfere with the sweet flow of electricity. But those boys cutting down the branches do not know the words "subtle" or "restraint". They whack those trees like the foliage had just offended their manhood. The above picture represents what can be seen everywhere around Decatur.

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts

  • My DWI trial (the one I'm defending - not accused of) will wrap up this morning. Those things are exhausting, and it's almost impossible to explain why.
  • And we had a very funny moment in trial when a trooper referred to traffic control devices embedded into a highway as a slang term that should never be said in mixed company. When I heard it I turned to the County Attorney who was sitting beside me, suppressing laughter, who whispered, "Don't look at me. Don't look at me."
  • Going to the mailbox really isn't any fun anymore.
  • I absolutely hate watching news footage of kids getting a vaccine.
  • Sheesh. The FAA revoked the license/certificate of the two pilots who overshot their airport last week. I understand a suspension, but destroying their livelihood?
  • Browsed the City of Denton book-in photos. This one got my attention (and the commenters are pretty funny.)
  • Lake Bridgeport is always hard to fill, but even I'm surprised it is still eight feet low after all the rain this year.
  • Heard a rumor from a triple un-fake reliable source that the Messenger's Update is close to a redesign that might possibly allow comments.
  • Did you know in 1998, before the Messenger had a web site, I got permission to scan the Update and upload it every day? Sure, I only got it uploaded in the evening, but that was pretty cool back then.
  • Bridgeport's Kyle Clifton memorabilia on E-bay. (Thanks, Mike.)
  • Anybody else uncomfortable with the DirecTV ad showing the very dead Chris Farley singing "Fat Boy in a Little Coat"?
  • Texas has only executed 19 people this year. We getting soft on crime?
  • A computer application I've always hated: Microsoft Outlook.
  • Afghanistan is about to turn into a cluster. And the top general wants us to send in 40,000 more troops? Man, this is really beginning to sound like Vietnam.
  • And all the while, Pakistan turns into a triple cluster. As you slept, a car bomb killed 80 in the most violent country in the world.
  • Which reminds me of one of the dumbest things W ever said, "If we withdraw, they will follow us home."
  • The Messenger did something genius this weekend: They began printing summaries of random calls for service that the Sheriff's office received. Completely wheels off and I plan to steal that idea.
  • Halloween on a Saturday night seems like a dangerous combo. Or a fun one.
  • For some crazy reason, the Ticket was debating how you "do meth" this morning. Host Craig Miller, at around 7:20 a.m., said, "Go to Wise County and ask somebody."

10.27.2009

Cockiest Two Point Conversion Ever

While I'm away all day defending what's left of the good ol' Constitution of the U S of A, we have coaches who trick up typical two point conversions. Is there a correlation? Naaaaa. And I'm too tired to make up one.

Forestburg Wreck

Someone mentioned to me about a fatality accident involving a teenage in Forestburg last night. If you've ever been to Forestburg, you know there's not much in Forestburg. A death of a teenage resident would rock any community but especially that one. Edit: Link

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts

  • Man, I took a beating for that Random Girl(s) pic yesterday. But I'm a man who appreciates inner beauty.
  • I knew newspapers are dying, but the most recent info is shocking. For example, from a year ago the Dallas Morning News' circulation is down 22%.
  • I had never seen this: Dallas TE Martellus Bennett dunks over his coach while at Texas A&M. But I still think he might be a spare.
  • The pilots that overshot the airport and were out of contact for over an hour now say they were just working on their laptops. They might want to come up with something better than that.
  • I dreamed all night I was moving a bedroom suite. How odd.
  • Oprah at the State Fair was broadcast yesterday. Did I watch it? Not a chance.
  • For those that hate Jerry Jones, his signing of Marcus Ware yesterday is another reason that you're crazy. Tom Hicks of the Rangers would never pay that kind of money.
  • I'm still not sure why we send up the Space Shuttle.
  • Did I see promos for a George Lopez talk show? Power. Down.
  • There's going to be free Swine Flu vaccines given away in Fort Worth on Friday? Isn't there a shortage? Doesn't that have a potential for a riot?
  • I've got a DWI trial today. This one is unusual --- more later.
  • I think Breast Cancer Awareness week would be more effective than a whole month. Lots of pink everywhere.

10.26.2009

"Fat Little Girlfriends"

Two Texas Tech Girls and A Longhorn Gal in Burnt Orange (Unconfirmed)

Texas Tech coach Mike Leach unloaded on people who might have distracted his players focus after their 52-30 loss Saturday to Texas A&M.

Among those prominently cited were what Leach called the "fat little girlfriends" of the players. Given the opportunity Monday to apologize or revise his comments, Leach instead grabbed a shovel and started digging.

He said his staff had failed to make "our points more compelling than their fat little girlfriends. Now their fat little girlfriends have some obvious advantages. For one thing, their fat little girlfriends are telling them what they want to hear, which is 'how great you are' and 'how easy its going to be' and we had a bunch of people who wanted to win the football game but nobody wanted to play the football game.

Source.

Monday Afternoon Pick Me Up

To make up for the thrashing I took for this morning's pic.

Ain't That America, For You And Me

Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid just announced that he plans to push ahead with a public option vote (although it allows States to opt out.) And A football player with Dallas gets $40 million guaranteed. And Girls Gone Wild should stay away from parts of Florida based upon these mugshots.

Random Monday Morning Thoughts

  • Watched Slumdog Millionaire again over the weekend. Still love it.
  • Ran outside on Saturday morning and was smart enough to appreciate it. Cool Fall morning, trees turning, realizing I've lived a pretty lucky life.
  • That wasn't my MLK "I've seen the mountain top" speech by they way.
  • Halloween is becoming a decorate-your-lawn kind of holiday. I like that.
  • Observation I stole from writer Richie Whitt: Cowboys' Miles Austin looks like A-Rod.
  • And even though he's had two good games, I'd tap the brakes on Austin's Hall of Fame induction.
  • Miley Cyrus' little sister dressed up for Halloween. Oh, my.
  • There's really a George Clooney moving coming out called "The Men Who Stare At Goats"?
  • There's some huge "get motivated" convention in Fort Worth today. Ugh. I would be very unmotivated this morning if I had to attend that.
  • You've got to be kidding: Over the weekend three helicopters went down in Afghanistan killing 14 U.S. soldiers. And all of them appear to be accidental crashes.
  • And in other war news: Car bombs kill 150 in Iraq. Whose idea was it to start a war there?
  • The woman ticketed in Dallas for "not speaking English" has been in the U.S. for 30 years. And she wants the City of Dallas to pay her $7,000 medical bill for going to the emergency room because she was "stressed" over the situation. Puhleeze.
  • I don't understand the "Halloween Party" at the Decatur Convention Center at a price of $80 a couple.

10.25.2009

Sneaky Snake

Stolen from Mark Peterson's Facebook page. That thing slithered up on his back porch in Decatur today.

Paranormal Activity

I saw this yesterday. Verdict: Not bad. The basic concept is that a young couple believe there are supernatural things going on in their house so they set up a camera to run throughout the night. It's like a poor man's Blair Witch Project. There are enough holes in the plot to drive a truck through like (get a dog, get a gun, turn on the lights every now and then) but it was really entertaining.

Random Football Thoughts

  • I would have bet a small fortune that A&M wouldn't beat Tech. Easily the most shocking result of the season so far. (A&M 52, Tech 30)
  • I can't believe that score.
  • The best headline about the game I saw read, "Stunned Guns."
  • I'm beginning to think Baylor shouldn't be in the Big 12, and it hurts to say that. (OSU 34, Baylor 7)
  • Any big high school should make an offer to Todd Dodge. He has to want to get out of that gig at North Texas. (Troy 50, UNT 26)
  • I felt pretty sure that BYU would beat TCU. I now feel pretty sure that TCU is very good. (TCU 38, BYU 7)
  • But mid-major Boise State, who doesn't have to play anyone after beating Oregon on opening weekend, could screw TCU over. The highest ranked of the two gets an automatic bid to a BCS bowl game, and the other can only get into it if invited. (Crazy BCS rules here.)
  • Edit: As a commenter pointed out, when the BCS standing were released after I wrote this, TCU had leapfrogged (get it?) Boise State.
  • Funny sign in the stands: "Boise Is Not A State. We Checked."
  • Kind of funny Game Day sign at BYU about TCU's starting QB: "Dalton Dates Cougars."
  • Nebraska turned the ball over eight times - four of them inside Iowa State's five yard line. You should never win when you do that. They didn't. (Iowa State 9, Nebraska 7)
  • Texas replaced a couple of wide receivers and now looks like they are ready to roll. They'll be in the National Championship game. And the way Alabama and Florida look, they could win it. Kill me. (Texas 41, Missouri 7)
  • I can't stand Tennessee's Lane Kiffin. But I like it when I have a villain.
  • Dallas' 3:00 p.m. start would give us a chance to see if the sun comes in from the west through the glass. But it's cloudy.
  • Jimmy Johnson was on the Fox pre-game show bragging about cutting Curvin Richards after fumbling in 1992. Sheesh. I feel compelled to mention that Jimmy's last game was a 62-7 loss in the playoffs when he was coaching Miami.
  • Worst. Uniforms. Ever.