South of Decatur this morning. Credit: Denny

Edit: Same Guy

Merry Christmas

Enjoy this life's road.

Random Friday Morning Thoughts

• There's no Update today, but I'm here. 
• I'll summarize what it probably says: Car wreck, County offices are closed, Church service somewhere, Funeral, Funeral, Funeral, Funeral. 
• Went to the Gaylord Texan yesterday. You know, it's beautiful but they really need to change some stuff from year to year.
• Ate at the Riverwalk mexican restaurant in the Gaylord and was given the worst table in the place. That seems to be a recurring them lately no matter where I go, so I (politely) asked to be moved.
• The construction on 114 through Grapevine is a beating and I can't imagine what it is like during rush hour.
• We were supposed to meet some friends yesterday and were actually stood up.
• I bought a leather jacket last year and love the heck out of it. I had no idea how warm those things are.
• Still kind of sick.
• I caught a little bit of the game show called "Money Drop" (or something like that) last nigh. It's Idiocracy but not bad at all. 
• Forgot a name on my list of Most Despised People: Chris Berman. 
• President Obama is vacationing in his home state of Hawaii. (Countdown to the first comment in three, two, one . . . . )
• Paris Hilton is there in a bikini. Hey, now. 
• The Today Show just told me that women's fingerless gloves are a big selling item this year. Kinda hawt. 
• I'll try to find the video of it, but there was an insane fist fight between two Mississippi State basketball players while they sat in the stands during a tournament. I mean they were going to town on each other. 
• Somebody buy Mrs. LL's ex-home. 
• I've got to run to the mall today -- I love the crazy Christmas Eve mall run.
• Fox 4's Mike Doocey is filling in on The Ticket during the holidays. That guy is really, really funny.
• This is a paper from Norway:

Nothing Says "Merry Christmas" Like A Face Full Of Mace

I know what you're thinking: That dumpy mall in Mesquite tries to get all uppity by putting an "e" at the end of "Town".

Story. (Which includes a youtube video with a "graphic language" warning --- Oh, those Americans and their sneakers.)

Worst Suicide Attempt Ever

BUCHAREST, Romania (AP) - Romania's government survived a no-confidence motion in Parliament on Thursday in a session overshadowed by a man who flung himself from the chamber's balcony, apparently in protest over the government austerity measures. His injuries were not life-threatening. 


Now you Tea Partiers don't be getting any crazy ideas. (But that had to smart a little bit.)

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• People are driving like nuts these days -- especially people just drifting into my lane.
• Last night I dreamed I was late to a court hearing and late to help out a friend who was running laps around a pool. Weird. 
• Still struggling with an irritating sickness. It's not a big deal, but I just have to keep Advil Cold & Sinus on hand or I'm doomed. It's the only thing that's ever worked, and I've bought enough of it over the years to have a pretty good size meth lab going. 
• Jon Stewart dedicated a show to 9/11 rescue workers who were seeking compensation for their injuries after a bill providing that coverage had languished in Congress for years. Call me skeptical, but everyone sure does assume that every single health problem those guys have are directly attributable to 9/11 smoke, dust and debris.
• Then less than a week after that show, the bill passed Congress yesterday with the House voting at the last minute for the bill, 206-60. (Notice that's barely half of the 435 members present.)
• I woke up before 5:00 feeling like I had been shot with caffeine.
• The Jet's Coach Foot Fetish Controversy that I led with yesterday is a major story on the Today Show this morning. That's why I'm the most trusted news source west of the Decatur square and east of McDonalds.
• As Gordon Keith wrote last week, there really are two Christmases most Americans acknowledge - the commercial one and the religious one. And they are completely separate.
• Told Mrs. LL we should skip lunch today and have a late breakfast at the Paris Coffee Shop. She had never heard of it. Then again, that menu doesn't look too healthy.
• Update on Mrs. LL's wrists: Surgery is a coming. (There sure were a lot of Worker's Comp hoops to jump through in order to get there.) 
• When our Sheriff's office released the book-in photo of the "Chico Flasher" yesterday, it instantly became news to the metroplex television stations and newspapers.
• Funny moment on the national Fox and Friends show this morning when they were doing a story about a guy that drove onto President Bush's front lawn last night. "And the guy that did that was Saul Garza . . . . " as they screwed up the transition to local Fox 4 reporter Saul Garza for a live spot. But they all laughed about the error once they caught it. 
• Our office is closed, yet I'm here for you.

Fire

Spider Maaaaaaawoahhhhhhh

I heard this yesterday -- that Spiderman's rope (or whatever) broke during a performance of the play on Broadway by the same name. The guy is said to be seriously injured. And the play is said to be a disaster.

But I've got a question? What was that strap made of? It snapped like a piece of frozen taffy.

My Christmas Gift

Since I'm a known Wise County high roller, I'm always getting emails of people trying to separate me from my billions. But I was scratching my head on this one trying to figure out what the heck I was being offered. (Click to enlarge).

Am I being offered to rent one of those planes for the number of "hours left?"  If so, I'd appreciate you readers pooling your money and getting me that Gulfstream for 25 hours. Sweet. And a new Pimp Daddy suit would be a nice stocking stuffer as well.

Come on. I've given you hours of entertainment and the only thing I ask for is a little quarter of a million dollar token of your appreciation.

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts

• NY Jets coach and wife in a foot fetish dating site"scandal" complete with homemade video? I feel pretty, pretty normal right now.  (Follow the Deadspin link within the story for full over-the-top coverage.)
• With all the promiscuity on TV, how in the world did the U.S. teenage birth rate reach a "record low" last year (meaning the lowest rate in 70 years of record keeping)? Amazing.
• I refuse to acknowledged the Dallas Mavericks. You guys go ahead and get sucked in. You have been warned (again and again and again.)
• Bad text from the Mrs. LL: "The bottom of the car sounds like it's about to fall off."
• USA Today releases its college football coach salary database. And to think Florida's Urban Meyer resigned because of "stress". Man, I could put up with a lot of stress for that bag of cash. 
• I also dream about my teeth falling out. 
• The alleged "Chico Flasher" has been caught. Hey should have gone with the more traditional foot fetish. Edit: Photo.
• Still on my Most Irritating List: George Lopez, Rudy Giuliani, Ann Curry, Peanuts cartoon strip, every host of Fox and Friends.
• People who I know personally and really don't like don't know that I don't like them. Make sense?
• Jogged by some kid yesterday who asked, "What's your name?" I just asked back, "What's yours?" and didn't wait for an answer. 
• I've got a headache and sore throat this morning. Please, please, please don't get worse.
• I see quite a few people mention that they "have two weeks off." What kind of job gives you two weeks off for Christmas?
• That male coach for the can't-be-beat-UConn-women's-team is extremely cocky, but for some reason I think I like him.
• I kind of want to take the Misses somewhere tonight to at least feel Christmasy. Downtown Fort Worth? Gaylord Texan? Southlake Square? Tater Junction?
• Hands down, WBAP's Mark Davis has the nerdiest picture on Twitter.
• Yay for cooler weather. Boo for 70% chance of rain on Friday. But at least we aren't in Southern California which might slide off into the ocean today due to a torrential downpour. 
• A must read Wheels Off story about a couple in Denton. Trust me, just when you think the guy was crazy . . . . 

Fox 4 Weatherman Ron Jackson: Then and Now

(Another Facebook discovery.)

But this isn't near as great as the Shaun Rabb discovery.

Wise County Crime Reports: It Was A Slow Week

Source.

Listen Up Class

The Census Bureau just announced there are 308,745,538 in the United States. (Think they missed anyone?)

Texas will gain four Congressional seats giving us 36 total due to a population increase to  25,145,561. (And the district lines will certainly be redrawn to make sure as many as possible are Republican. See chart showing how Texas keeps gaining seats over the years.)

Go and impress your friends with your new knowledge.

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts

• I'll give credit to the Denton County lady who was kidnapped last week and driven to New Mexico. She's so thankful to be alive that she doesn't have the slightest desire to give a TV interview. 
• I was disappointed with the MNF game in Minnesota last night. It was cold but with very little snow.
• The only thing more annoying than Brett Favre being a Drama Queen (he went from "out" to "starting" last night -- something that has happened only 20 of 4,633 times since 2001) is Jon Gruden's fawning over him. Sheesh, get a room. 
• I've got a timer on my Christmas lights which may be the greatest invention in the history or ever. 
• I've said for years that picking out one single day to argue "for" or "against" global warming is dumb. (Global warming concerns an increase in the average temperature by 1 degree for every hundred years.)  So yesterday the Limbaugh followers around here were suggesting Al Gore flip the coin at the Minnesota game last night since it was being played in single digit temperatures. And they did so as North Texas set a temperature record for December 20th. Idiocracy.
• The Baylor women played in front of 10,000 in Waco last week, but the box score from their game at Clemson last night shows attendance of 335. I presume school is out at Clemson. Edit: Ooops. The game was played somewhere in the Bahamas (for some crazy reason.)
• TCU's baseball team leads off at #1 in the nation according to the "Collegiate Baseball's" preseason poll. (Whoever they are.) 
• I woke Mrs. LL up for a hair appointment this morning only to be informed that it is scheduled for this afternoon. And then she laughed. 
• Funny Sarah Palin interview, due to what is in the background, about killing animals.
• I've seen pics this morning of the lunar eclipse. Meh. 
• I never have a fun or pleasant dream, and I dream every night. It's always some crisis that typically deals with running late. Seriously, the number of times I've woken up and thought, "Thank goodness it was only a dream" is staggering. 
• Remember to gather the family around the TV tonight for an important Christmas tradition: It's the Beef 'O' Brady's Bowl. 
• Every news story about airport temporary shut down has to include an interview with one passenger who is very angry followed by another interview with someone who has a "what are you going to do?" attitude. (But did you see that Colorado is expected to get eight feet of snow over the next couple of days.)
• I looked at that University of Minnesota webcam (below) several times yesterday. I don't know why I think stuff like that is so cool. 
• Weird: Fox 4 ran a big story last night of a missing 13 year old girl and then she shows up this morning on her family's doorstep. 

Lunar Eclipse: Dumb Guy Question

I don't care about the lunar eclipse tonight, but maybe because I'm not smart enough to appreciate it. This is what happens: The Earth blocks out the sun hitting the moon so it will seem as if the moon disappears.  Isn't that the same thing as a New Moon (the opposite of a full moon)? I think I know the answer is "no", but I have no idea why.

I don't understand the moon. The sun? Now that I get. I understand why days get shorter in the winter and longer in the summer.  I remember demonstrating the science with a cantaloupe and a girlfriend in my kitchen once. (She was not impressed. Should have used different fruit.)  And I understand that a solar eclipse occurs when the moon gets between the Earth and the sun (we had a cool one when I was in high school.)

But the moon I don't understand. When, say, half of the moon isn't visible once a month, what's causing that if it is not the Earth? In fact, what causes the shadows on all of those images above? To quote Antoine Dodson, I "must be really, really dumb."

Yeah, I could look it up, but I have you.

Monday Night Football -- Baby, It's Cold Outside

Even if you're not a football fan, you might want to check out Monday Night Football because the Vikings and Bears will be playing outside at the University of Minnesota's stadium due to the roof collapse at the Metrodome last weekend.  Four to six inches of snow is supposed to fall today and through the evening.

The above image was captured from a very cool University of Minnesota webcam a few seconds ago. Edit: Oops. Forgot to post the very cool link.

Hey, Now

Just had a long time reader email me from a California hotel pointing out a hot weather gal they've got out there.

And for that, sir, we thank you.

Random Monday Morning Thoughts

• An officer was struck by a drunk driver in Garland over the weekend. I swear that's the fourth or fifth time that's happened this year.
• Had three boys show up at the door yesterday asking if the 7th grader was home. Say what?
• I'm a fan on the Sunday afternoon nap.
• There's was a guy in an armed standoff with cops at a downtown Dallas restaurant this morning. It got even odder when it was learned that it was the same guy that stole a cop car while handcuffed last week..
• The doctor that delivered me, Dr. Huddleston in Bridgeport, died over the weekend.  I remember that he even made a house call for me when I hit my noggin' on a brick wall on Christmas Day. 
• Made the misses watch Boogie Nights last night. I'd forgotten how shocking that thing is.
• Dan Godwin is one awkward anchor man when he fills in on Fox 4.
• I think it would be pretty hard to get hit by a car on 287 like that lady did in Rhome this weekend. 
• Saw parts of I Love You, Man over the weekend. Pretty funny. 
• Also saw some of Michael Moore's Capitalism: A Love Story. It was really good as well but I hate it when he does bits like trying to make a citizens arrest or, as in earlier documentaries, reads the Patriot Act over a loudspeaker around Washington or takes a boat of people to Guantanamo Bay to get health care. 
• So we've had the 70s, 80s, 90s, etc. but what are we going to call the decade that is coming to a close. (Or did it come to a close last year?)  I just don't think "the Aughts" will catch on. 
• Video that keeps popping up over the last few days: U of Hawaii's band forming a stick figured football player who then kicks a ball.
• I didn't turn on the Cowboy game yesterday, but I did hear they have given up 30 or more points for four straight games -- something they haven't done since they went 1-15. 
• And another.
• Megan Fox wore a bikini yesterday but I was distracted by the writing on the side of her rib cage.
• I'm going to kill the Family Cat. What exactly is the purpose of that thing?
• A Methodist Church bus from Denton wrecked in the mountains of Colorado this weekend as it was carrying a group for a ski trip. One 11 year old girl was seriously injured. Why's a church involved in a ski trip anyway? Especially the week before Christmas.
• There was a story in the Star-Telegram this weekend about Tarrant County government, bonds, and the Doctor's Hospital in Bridgeport. I'd comment if I could understand a single word of it. 

“I did a terrible thing as honorably as I could.”

Noticed this wedding announcement story in the New York Times is getting a lot of buzz today.

Edit: This update shares some of the firestorm that erupted.

I Don't Post Many NFL Clips But This Is Worthy

Punt return for game winning TD. I'm not sure I've ever seen that.

And this is the same guy that hit the brakes at the one against the Cowboys last week and then fell backwards into the end zone.