Above The Fold

OK, One More British Open

He could have won big money with this: "I bet I can hit this out of the bunker onto the green and have it come back and approach from me behind."

When Fox Wants A Perfect Union Worker, They Find One

The 1960s Would Be Ashamed Of Our Protest Abilities

PROTEST: Small group demonstrates against Dallas Co. Judge Clay Jenkins plan to shelter "border kids" outside office. pic.twitter.com/gjvFl3CUbs
— Carla N. Wade (@CarlaNWade) July 18, 2014

Counter Demonstration: More people showing up in support of Jenkins & plan to shelter "border kids" in Dallas. pic.twitter.com/5V3D3T80SD
— Carla N. Wade (@CarlaNWade) July 18, 2014

The Ol' Swing On A Rope Almost Get Killed Trick

Youtube: My sisters attempt at the ole rope swing in key west florida. Her foot got caught in the loop and slammed hard into the rocks. She Split her head open and got pretty banged up but she walked away from it with no broken bones or serious injuries.

Ok. Calm down. She's fine. But, man, that trip back towards the shore would be terrifying. And thumbs up to the puppy dog for at least being concerned. Thumbs down to the guy who must be on his way to rob a train.

Get Me This Goat Trying To Stand On A Bean Bag

Random Friday Morning Thoughts

• They will be selling beer at UNT football games this year. (SMU has already announced it would do so.) Something that seems unheard of only a few years ago now hardly gets any attention. 
• You know, I was a little surprised at how easy it was to take a jetliner out from 33,000 feet with a missile launched from the ground. Most experts believe this is the type that was used.
• One of the most bizarre stories about the Malaysian aircraft disaster was the Dutch passenger who made a pre-flight joke (about the still missing MH370 flight from March) by taking a picture of the plane and posting it with the caption  "If it disappears, this is what it looks like."
• Random money thought: Google's last quarter revenue increased 22% when compared to last year. That would be $16 billion in a quarter. Meanwhile, Microsoft announced it will lay off up to 18,000. 
• I can't find it anywhere, but I saw a clip of a commercial for the "Undertaker Brothers" which was created by the owners of  the Johnson Family Mortuary in Fort Worth where a few unburied bodies were found this week. It was gold.
• I'm about to clean out the garage but first I've got to give notice to the Ladies In The House that I'm going to do it. Why? I will throw dang near anything away unless I think it will be used within the next year. 
• I finally heard Sean Bergin, the New Jersey reporter who was demoted for saying that "young black men growing up without fathers" were the cause of a recent wave of violence. The guy thinks a lot of himself and is trying to make himself into a martyr. And he now claims that he made the statement knowing it might cost him his job because he cares for all the young people being killed and someone "had to have the courage to say it." Riiiiight.
• Yesterday evening might have been the greatest July evening weather-wise ever.
• I've lost a ton of money on individual stock bets over the years (something I no longer do) but, on a lark, I actually bought 100 shares of American Airlines when it dropped to about three dollars ten years ago. There were rumors of bankruptcy, and I thought "no way". Some how, some way, despite finally declaring bankruptcy, those shares survived. They now sell at $42. 
• Am I smug about that stock? Nope. I only bought 100 shares -- a massive mistake. And I also bet on Enron and WorldCom. I would have had better luck at a roulette table. 
• Fox Southwest has been replaying major Big 12 football games from last year with basically every play but edited down to one hour. It is fantastic. 
• I don't think anything will reveal a person's "true colors" more than than the opinion they have on the "border crisis". (Which may not have been a "crisis" after all.) 
• Someone honked at me yesterday (not in a friendly manner) and for the life of me I don't know what I did. 

And Everyone Of Them Would Admit They Have No Idea What They Are Doing

The @dallas_da welcomes a new class of #prosecutors to the Misdemeanor division. #dallasda #criminaljustice pic.twitter.com/D9Y6opQstk
— Dallas DA (@dallas_da) July 17, 2014

Random financial thought:

The average starting salary for an incoming assistant DA in 2007 (best numbers I could quickly find) was $56,000. Let's adjust it conservatively upwards to $60,000. You're looking at $1.2 million a year in salaries alone.  Throw in benefits, retirement, support staff, office space, and supplies and that's a ton of taxpayer money.

I was curious what the total budget was for the Dallas DA's office, but for the life of me I couldn't find it.

And Another - Connecticut

2014 is making a heck of a comeback in the summertime.

Story.

Random DPS News

Off-duty Texas trooper accidentally shoots self http://t.co/s4fHbg3Cjs
— WFAA TV (@wfaachannel8) July 17, 2014

The Real Evil Empire At It Again? Or A Ukrainian Screw Up?

Flashback:

Edit!:

Probably My Only British Open Post Ever

Ernie Els three putting from point blank range:



Tiger Woods hitting some guy in the noggin' (on the one hop):



Tiger Woods not honoring one of the Ten Commandments:

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• Per Channel 4, Sanger received 11.3 inches of rain last night (shutting down parts of I-35 this morning.) And, they claim, Decatur received 7.4. And Fort Worth and Dallas received nothing. How weird. 
• More accuracy of the Israeli missiles: Four dead kids on a Gaza beach.
• "If there were 2,000 puppies on the border that needed temporary homes, I wonder what our reaction in Dallas would be." - Tim Rogers of D Magazine.
• College football next year: On the same day, 9/3/2016, we have Alabama vs. USC in Arlington, UCLA at Texas A&M and Notre Dame at Texas. Wow.
• I was walking around the block last night and exchange greetings with a couple of kids as they got in their car. Less than a minute later and less than 200 yards away they pulled out in front of another vehicle and a wreck occurred. No injuries, but that sound of screeching tires and metal colliding is one of the worst sounds ever. 
• A Longview chiropractor went on a diving trip off the coast of Florida and didn't return to the boat. They believe a shark got him. 
• I watched a little of the EPSY's last night hosted by Drake. Is that guy supposed to be cool? Musicians shouldn't try to be comedians. Comedians shouldn't try to be musicians. 
• President Obama plans a 16-day Martha's Vineyard vacation on a $12 million, 10-acre forested estate. (I smile just thinking of the reaction out there.)
• That first surveillance photo of a guy that Decatur PD is looking for looks like some type of art work. That's beautifully done. 
• The Family Pig is still well behaved. I hadn't planned on this. Figured he'd be gone by now. 
• "The Christian Wrestling Federation will be at Movement Church in Rhome (1194 CR 4651) at 10 a.m. Sunday." Almost seems like a headline out of The Onion.
• Ron Howard will direct a Beatles documentaries about their touring years. Yes, please.
• Funny: An Arizona Congressman raced to the scene of an incoming bus of migrant children to protest and tweeted that accepting them was not compassionate because he saw the "fear" on their faces. Turns out it was just a regular school bus of local kids heading to a YMCA camp. 

Courtney Stodden Makes An Appearance At Capitol Hill Today

Passing out Veggie Dogs for PETA in a lettuce bikini.

Of course.

Remember That Tech Recruit Who Got Kicked Out Of School Before He Started . . .

. . . for slugging the school's best female basketball player? Well, they've released the video. I'm not saying it's earthshaking, but he definitely popped her really hard.

In related news, a grand jury declined  to indict him on a felony.  First, I'm not sure why it went to the grand jury because it looked like a misdemeanor assault. (Unless it caused some type of permanent disfigurement or impairment, then they could get it to the felony level.)  Likely, she doesn't want to pursue it and wants the whole issue to go away. The kid didn't walk away scot free because he has suffered  the consequences of losing a full ride to Tech. The prosecutors probably thought that was a decent disposition but had the grand jury "make" the decision for political cover.

Edit: Welp, had that wrong. He was reinstated late this afternoon.

American Ninja Chick

I mentioned American Ninja this morning and have since learned this clip is making the rounds. It is noteworthy because it aired last night, was filmed in Fair Park in Dallas (which has never looked so good), and features the first woman to complete the obstacle course. Pretty incredible.

(For the sticklers, you'll note the youtube timer and the timer on the screen do not stay in synch. Apparently, the show will edit out portions of a run which do not impact the outcome. Like resting.)

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts

• Lowe's Markets has purchased both grocery stores in Jacksboro and shut one of them down.
• Boyd PD recently received/purchased five "trucks" for its police department. And, I've heard, they are all new. 
• The web site run by uber-election predictor Nate Silver says that the Democrats are perilously close to losing the Senate in the Fall. (The stuff they do is pretty interesting.)
• Something that isn't getting enough press is that discovery of a German U-Boat in the Gulf of Mexico. I heard so many people say yesterday that they had no idea that Germany was sinking ships in the Gulf during World War II. I'm right there with them.
• Deion's Prime Prep Academy was shut down by the state yesterday. The SMU recruit and Prime Prep graduate announcing he won't go to SMU one day before that is beginning to make sense. 
• In this day and time of drones, Israel and Hamas firing missiles at each other is very sticks and stones like.
• Thanks for all the tips on the A/C issue yesterday. I change the inside filters and took a hose to the outside unit as suggested. If the breaker trips one more time, we'll bring in someone who knows what they are doing.
• And for those that missed it, the funniest comment told me to open up the outdoor unit and start poking around in there. It was signed by Double Fake Coker Funeral Home.
• Sports: (1) I'd flip over to the All-Star Game last night every now and then but all that Derek Jeter fawning was too much to take. (2) The Mavericks will be average to slightly above average next year. No one is calculating in Dirk's decline which has already begun. They'll be a middle rung team -- exactly where you don't want to be. (3) The Big 12 Media Guide is now online so I checked it out because I wanted to see how Baylor is now doing in the all time records section. They weren't bad. But, man, those Mike Leach years at Tech dominate the passing categories. (4) The Longhorns are worried about four of its players dining with an agent. 
• On Saturday morning I came across a Batman marathon from the 1960s. I watched a couple of them and was very surprised by the subtle comedy injected in those shows. (Robin: "Trouble?" Batman: "Trouble? Oh, we've got trouble. Right here in Gotham City!") 
• The Texas appeals judge arrested for DWI finally had her mugshot released. Still pretty hot. 
• Man, the conservatives have to be careful in trying to justify their border security attack by basing it on the potential "diseases" that these migrant kids might have. Mark Davis has done it. Dan Patrick has done it. And Sean Hannity harps on it constantly. That's dangerously close to calling them "dirty Mexicans", no? 
• By my unofficial count of indictments handed down by the last Wise County Grand Jury, 27 of the 47 indictments were for drugs. There has to be a a better way. 
• The Girls In The House are a fan of American Ninja Warrior.
• Very, very late last night, the Denton City Council voted against banning fracking in the city. But regardless of that vote, the general public will vote on the issue in November. So why even mess with it last night?

Above The Fold

And Tomorrow, Archie Will Die

Freckle-faced Archie will meet his demise when he intervenes in an assassination attempt on senator Kevin Keller, Archie Comics' first openly gay character, who's pushing for more gun control in Riverdale. Archie's death, which was first announced in April, will mark the conclusion of the "Life with Archie" series. More.

That's a long way from singing Sugar, Sugar.

Edit: And in case you were wondering if the Archie comic series was already financially dead . . .

As A Former Boat Owner, I Don't Think That's The Correct Way To Do That

So much going on here. One vehicle pulling another vehicle which is pulling a boat. The very timely "Oh, no" as we learn there is certainly more to come. The fairly calm reaction of the victims and especially the guy on the other boat who just takes another swig of beer. And all to "Turn Down For What."

Well played.

(F Bomb warning.)

I'm No Mental Health Expert . .

. . . but I think I'd keep this girl away from the cameras and make sure she has all the help she needs. You know the trouble is coming.

Story. (A brief one.)

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts

• OK you HVAC experts, my unit, which is about five years old and has always worked like a charm, has tripped the breaker for the last three days in a row. Is that an A/C issue? A breaker box issue? Something else?
• Yesterday I was on the verge of posting the video of a little girl who "came to life" in the Philippines during her funeral -- a story which has since gone somewhat mainstream -- until I read she had since been declared dead again. Frankly, I'm not so sure she was ever revived. I bet there will be lots of backtracking on this story today. 
• Bridgeport ISD's school board voted not to renew the superintendent's contract for "another year". But he still has three years remaining on his current deal. Do votes like that always take place so far in advance? Do superintendents like that so at least they have a warning about their future? Doesn't it create a lame duck and an uncomfortable situation? And isn't there always the chance that elections during the next three years could revamp the school board into a group that will then vote to extend him? 
• A hot mic caught ESPN's Chris Berman debating whether to stand during a "Stand Up 2 Cancer" moment at the (horrible) Home Run Derby last night. We also get to hear him grunt trying to get that body on two legs, and also get to hear him wonder if the cameras will be able to catch his tribute. 
• FBC of Dallas pastor Robert Jeffress thinks that we need a stronger border, but didn't spend any time talking about carrying for poor and needy children in his appearance on (sheesh) Fox and Friends. Another pastor in Dallas took him to task and also nicknamed him "Pastor Downtown." Funny.
• "30 years ago today an accident put me in a wheelchair." - Greg Abbott yesterday. Accident? He sued for millions about an incident he now refers to as an "accident"? 
• I think I figured out what bugs me about Fox 4's Clarice Tinsley: After a reporter on remote throws it back to her, she always has to throw out some mundane comment. (i.e. "Thanks, Lara. That was inspiring." "Thanks, Todd. We'll all can learn something from that little girl.")
• SMU basketball lost a prized incoming freshman yesterday who shockingly decided he wanted to play overseas for a year and then go to the NBA. Some think their might be academic issues or amateur status issues. Why? He's a product of Prime Prep Academy. Prime Time. Prime Time. 
• The Senate is considering legislation which would basically trump and repeal any state law restricting abortion (sonograms, waiting periods, clinic regulation.) I'm surprised they've waited so long because they probably have that power under the Commerce Clause and any federal law would trump state law. But practically speaking, the Democrats would need the House to get that thing passed so it's probably just a time waste. 
• After checking the radar and thinking that the storms were over yesterday, I proclaimed to the Sixth Grader In The House that "Rain can't touch me!" and then took off jogging. Five minutes later I was caught in a soaker. 

Tony Romo And Hooter Girls Wrapping Up Your Monday

Random Basketball Clip

Sudden death? In basketball? Yep, in this "D League" game last night, it came down to the first team to score wins.  If I've got this rule right, sudden death kicks in if the game goes to a second overtime.

I'd much rather see that then foul, free throw, foul, free throw. Time out. Repeat.

Public Service Announcement

Hey, all you kids out there. Now this is how you're supposed to react when you get a gift. Complete joy. Complete appreciation.

Now the fact I want that reaction when I bring home a loaf of bread from the store might require some adjustment of expectations. Other than that, let this be our guide.

Texting And Swimming

Random DWI Arrest

The only good thing for her is that the jail wouldn't release her book-in photo so they had to run a "Hey, now" pic.

Story.

Random Hail Storm On Beach In Siberia

I didn't know there were recreational beaches in Siberia.

Random Monday Morning Thoughts

• Mrs. LL slept walked last week and ended up standing in the corner. After I got her in back in bed I started thinking about Paranormal Activity and couldn't go back to sleep. 
• Fox 4 did a feature on Bridgeport's "off road park" which is apparently quite popular. I'm not sure I understand that "sport".
• I stumbled upon a 30 for 30 on Marcus Dupree again and couldn't turn it off. 
• Ticket fans only: Jake Kemp was on WFAA last night and they used a graphic referring to him as a "space enthusiast."
• I fell asleep during the World Cup final.
• Israel doesn't seem to care if it kills innocent civilians in the Gaza Strip with the launch of all of those missiles. 
• I'm hearing there will be an NBA players strike in two years. I mentioned the other day that I thought their current union contract really screwed them over.
• KISS played in Dallas over the weekend and only went for 75 minutes -- which is apparently routine for them. (That'd be 75 minutes too long for me.)
• Headlines in the Texas Lawyer this week: "Firm Sues Former Partner Over $1.4 Million Trustee Fee Earned in Dreier Bankruptcy", "Law Firm Files Defamation Lawsuit Over Ex-Client's Yelp Review Lawyer", "Law Firm Deny Allegations in Ex-Client's $2.64 Million Lawsuit Over Postnup", and "Personal Injury Law Firm Asserts First Amendment Defense in Internet Defamation Suit Filed by Competing PI Firm." It is commonplace to see lawyers vs. lawyers, and lawyers vs. clients these day. 
• Rick Perry seems to have gotten off the pain pills. There is no way he can give that many interviews without screwing up. 
• I've watched some parts of We're The Millers over again. I think that it is really funny.  And I'm beginning to believe that Django Unchained may be one of my favorite Tarantino movies.
• I kept hearing references to Cyber Dust in some of these Maverick free agent discussions. It's an app which (1) causes text messages to disappear in 24 seconds, (2) sounds a lot like Snapchat, and (3) is funded by Mark Cuban so it has a high possibility of failing.
• Mrs. LL and I saw a video of that Tupac hologram and she thinks in the future you'll be able to project a deceased loved one right into your living room and even converse with them. That sounds crazy but will probably be true. Then she gave me a stop down moment when she said she'll bring me back but have the hologram make me taller. 
• One thing I won't watch a second of: ESPN's Home Run Derby.