11.20.2015

It's Friday, Let's Get Out Of Here

But not so fast . . .

Nice effort but you can't change your mind and go back. . .


Here we go. Let's get out of here in style . . .


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Sneaky Llama In Bridgeport



This was at the "Center for Animal Research and Education, a non-profit big cat sanctuary in Bridgeport, Texas."

Amazingly, I found it on The Daily Mail. 
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Random Friday Morning Thoughts



  • What?
  • DPS, in order to keep better statistics, will have troopers actually ask the driver their race during a traffic stop. Oh, that will go well. (Not to mention the driver has absolutely no obligation to answer. But they do have every right to be offended.) This order, of course, came from DPS Director Steve McCraw who seems to embarrass DPS every chance he gets.
  • Wise County has had seven tornadoes this year?
  • Donald Trump wants to have a U.S. database composed of the identification of every Muslim in the United States. And they would be required to register. Didn't Nazi Germany require every Jew to register as well?  Good lord, is this real life?
  • And remember he wants to deport every illegal alien, as well.  That's small government at its finest! Yet, he leads in the polls!
  • What a crazy case: A Fort Worth oil and gas man received a life sentence for gunning down his girlfriend's  ex-husband in Benbrook. One month ago he didn't seem to concerned when he tweeted: "I own Minerals in Western Okla. That I would Sale. If interested, pattonenergy@gmail.com or 817-994-1961., Thanks JohnnyP"
  • Looks like Santa Claus was putting the move on the ladies yesterday in Bridgeport.
  • Hey, what was the purposed of the vaccination that kids in the 1960s had to get which caused a scab and then a permanent scar on your shoulder? 
  • It looks like The Family Unit is going to have a Chinese student stay with us over the Thanksgiving holidays. It's going to be a girl. If it would have been a boy, I would have had him go up to the Senior in the House for the first time and re-create a scene from Sixteen Candles by asking, "What's happening hot stuff?"
  • I took a quick glance at an episode of Fargo last night but didn't have time to watch the whole thing. I like the feel of the show. I may go on a watching binge tomorrow when the temperatures plummet.
  • Sports: (1)With TCU's quarterback banged up, I haven't heard anything about Decatur's former quarterback who is on the team. What happened? He was in the battle for second string in the Spring and now he's not in the top three. (2) I can't imagine Baylor winning at OSU on Saturday night with a banged up QB, and I can't believe the line is Baylor +1. (3) I can't imagine TCU beating OU, either, (4) But just when you  think there is no way a team will win, it happens.




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11.19.2015

I've Always Thought He Would Prefer A Glock 9 mm

And I love Internet photoshop humor . . .


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Thursday Afternoon Pick Me Up



Jeff Lynne's ELO stopped by "The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon" Wednesday to perform a pair of tracks, including a web-exclusive rendition of Electric Light Orchestra's 1977 hit, "Mr. Blue Sky."

Always loved this song, and throw in the small string section and fantastic back up singers and you have one heck or rendition of this song.
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Every. Single. Story.


Now that's one heck of a newspaper.
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Random Thursday Morning Thoughts



  • Another attempted ATM theft -- this time in Irving. The method of operation was the same as yesterday: Steal a vehicle and then smash that vehicle into a convenience store.
  • Our Governor tried to justify trying to keep Syrian refugees by citing to a story on Breitbart.com. I'll say it: I miss Rick Perry.
  • It is estimated that Syrian Refugees could cause 1,184 murders in Texas in one single year. I'm sorry, I got that wrong. That's the number of murders committed in Texas in 2014. The governor might want to focus on that. (By the way, ISIS claims it has killed a total of 800 people this year across three continents. And it's not ISIS we are talking about seeking refuge. We are talking about Syrians fleeing a horrible situation.)
  • I've been told time and time ago I must watch the FX series Fargo and that the second season, which is currently ongoing, is fantastic. I'm assuming the episodes are available online. 
  • There was a 4.7 earthquake in Oklahoma last night which has been reported to have lasted for several seconds. 
  • I left early the other day for work and went back to the bedroom where Mrs. LL was still asleep. She woke up, looked at me, oddly told me my hair looked good, and even more oddly used the Chinese word for "hair". She would go back to sleep and later had no memory of the event. 
  • I'm still not clear on the facts, but a cop tackling a female lawyer from a prominent Dallas law firm in her own Southlake lawn when she was not accused of a crime (her son had smoke weed) will lead to the Southlake PD getting sued. 
  • I had a nightmare that bagofnothing.com has complained about recently. I actually bolted up from sleep because I dreamed there was a horse in the bedroom and he was leaning down with an open mouth to bite a sleeping Mrs. LL. Now that qualifies as a nightmare.
  • A new lawyer got his feelings hurt by a blogging lawyer and fired off a "cease and desist" letter where he referred to himself in the third person. The response by the blogging lawyer is beyond entertaining.






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11.18.2015

Muslim Patent Lawyer Surprises Fox News With Outfit



Back story with with pictures right before it happened and why she did it.

(Donald Trump said he would shut down a house of worship in America?)

Edit: And for those who call it "flag desecration" you incorrectly believe that the "Flag Code" applies to private individuals. How else is it legal to burn your own personal American flag if you so choose? See Texas v. Johnson, 491 U.S. 397 (1989)
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Get Me This Relaxed Dog!!!




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The War On Christmas Got Off To A Big Start This Year



"Hail, Satan?"

I've been trying to figure out if they are saying something else, but I can't.

I'm insane now.
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Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts



  • Man, there are a lot ATM thefts in the metroplex, and a convenience store in Hurst almost was destroyed last night when one was taken from it -- that will happen when you just drive a vehicle straight into the store to break in. I'd like to be a fly on the wall when they try to get it open. (I think that was a scene in Breaking Bad.)
  • Fox News' Bill O'Reilly was really odd last night when, in connection with the HIV announcement of Charlie Sheen, he called it "legal mumbo jumbo" when legal "expert" guests Kimberly Guilfoyle and Lis Wiehl tried to explain whether it would he a crime in California if Sheen had infected someone with HIV. (It would only be a felony if Sheen "intended" to infect the person, they explained, and it would be a misdemeanor otherwise. That's not exactly a high tone legal mumbo jumbo concept that's hard to understand.)
  • The aforementioned Lis Wiehl is pretty hot. Fox News originated the Random Thought Girl being on screen while discussing politics. I just stole the idea. I apologize for this theft of intellectual property.
  • Today I might file the most unusual Motion ever in the 271st District Court. And not only will it include an interesting constitutional argument, but I'm fairly certain it will also be the first Motion filed in the history of the United States which references the "Salami Theory" and the book Bonfire of the Vanities in footnotes. 
  • Oil is at $41 a barrel. That's not going help the oil field come back anytime soon. It was at $105 in June of last year and at $144 in July of 2008.
  • TCU dropped in the Playoff Rankings yesterday after escaping horrible Kansas on Saturday. Hey, win out and you'll be in the Top 4. The same goes for Baylor. But I don't see either winning out.
  • I always get sucked into Lost in Translation. But I saw Bill Murray on Anthony Bourdain's CNN show over the weekend and he has really, really aged.
  • Countdown to the random guy in a Lexus commercial who just seems to easily and without stress present his wife with a new car.
  • I just saw a Black Friday commercial by NTB (National Tire and Battery.) I never thought of those products as part of Black Friday. Wait a second! Mrs. LL, I now know what you are getting for Christmas!! What's the PSI on those suckers on the Gangsta mobile? 
  • Gov. Abbott wants to "re-screen" Syrian immigrants who have already settled in Texas.  Maybe that screening can take place in a newly created Texas Syrian Concentration Camp sponsored by Pepsi or Doritos. (He also gave someone a government job as "State Refugee Coordinator." It sounds like she has been a government employee for 28 years.)

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11.17.2015

And You Wonder Why The Supreme Court Has Decided To Hear The Texas Abortion Case



Story published this morning.

And consider the Syrian refugee problem where the Texas (male) leaders are attempting to keep all of them out -- even children. Does every life actually matter?
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Baby Race! Who Ya Got!?

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Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts




  • That was quite the storm. I'm not sure we've had a Family Unit Security Meeting in the middle of the night in the history of ever but we did last night. (Side note to Mrs. LL: Next time don't tweet about me wearing The Family Guy pajama pants with tennis shoes as my emergency protection gear. But it was a ridiculous look and that was comedy gold.)
  • Pete Delkus spent this morning retweeting compliments about his performance last night. That is such bad form. And we didn't turn to Channel 8 once during the storm. 
  • Three Texas universities are facing federal scrutiny over how they have handled sexual violence allegations. Trinity is one of them? You kidding me? Trinity?
  • Great Ticket segment this morning: If you had the power to allow your dog to talk, would you? Answer: NO WAY! What a beating that would be.
  • Texas attempting to (illegally) stop any Syrian refugee from living here makes perfect sense. I mean, Governor Abbott (who amazingly has made Gov. Perry look like Einstein) is worried about a terrorist attack, right? His policy would solve the problem. There's no way one of them could, say, move to Colorado and drive to Austin. Abbott is playing politics, and it is embarrassing. 
  • And Mark Davis started his program off today going on a rant about anyone who would invoke Jesus as a reason to take in Syrian refugees. Since there exists the possibility that there could be one terrorist, "Tell me in the Bible," Davis said, "Where Jesus said you should risk your life" in order to show compassion for your fellow man? Oh, I thought about two verses in about one-half of a second: "This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you. Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." 
  • Do they still teach people to go to a particular corner of the house during a tornado? That never made any sense to me.  Once I saw the damage from the Wichita Falls tornado in the 1970s, I was pretty well convinced it didn't matter where you were in a house when every house you see for a mile was knocked off its slab.
  • We've got another Wise County government office "closed for training". This time is will be for two straight days. 
  • I would never debate Sean Hannity because he is the master or interruption and setting up straw men. But I've seen him schooled twice in the last week by two different guests. I never dreamed I would see that. (Here's an example of what he does: If he has a guest on that wishes to debate him about the no-waiting-period aspect of selling a handgun to someone at a gun show, he will interrupt him in the first minute with a question like, "So you don't believe a father has the absolute right to protect his daughters with a handgun when a rapist breaks into his home with the intention to attack his daughters?" The question has nothing to do with debate, the guest is shocked and taken aback, and Hannity then controls the conversation.) 
  • Idiocracy: Donald Trump took a shot at UFC fighter Ronda Rousey after her (violent) loss on Saturday by saying he was glad she lost because she is "not a nice person." And since we now have Trump weighing in on a UFC fight, America is as close to President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho than ever before. And it is entertaining. Disturbing. But entertaining.
  • Note to city council folks: Don't all show up at the same place in Wise County for dinner and sit at the same table. Even if you aren't talking about government business, it just looks bad and gives the appearance of an Open Meetings violation.





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11.16.2015

And To Think I Can't Fish Or Hunt Without A Licence


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Breaking: Charlie Sheen Has "The HIV"?



Story
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Just In Case You Think You're Having A Bad Monday




More.

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Good Grief




And a state has no authority to not "accept" a refugee authorized entrance by the United States.

#Idiocracy
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Random Monday Morning Thoughts




  • The attack on Paris on Friday was unnerving, and it appears that ISIS was behind it.  Wasn't the Middle East more stable when Saddam was in power in Iraq? Why exactly did we go after him?
  • I think I've watch Pulp Fiction fifty times and another one was added this weekend. (And Mrs. LL pointed out things in the background which I have never noticed. For example, before the needle-in-the-heart scene there were two kid/board games in the background. Life and Operation.)
  • It is Idiocracy when I wake up and my Twitter time line is full of references to one female beating another female in a UFC fight. (But, man, she wore almost nothing on an appearance on Jimmy Fallow where she basically predicted she would lose.)
  • I stumbled upon a religious channel yesterday and saw Joel Osteen. He was doing his same bit. I will paraphrase his "sermon": "Are you having marriage issues? Do you have debt and creditors who are hounding you? Do you have a child which has lost his way? Have you lost your job and having trouble finding another? Do you suffer from addiction?" The people that attend his church, or any church that resembles it, are being conned.
  • And later in the day I went back to the same channel and saw "Changing Your Life with Gregory Dickow". This guy was doing the same schtick as Olsteen but had it ramped up by talking about the power of communion and its "supernatural powers" as he quoted Bible verses.  It turned out only to be Informational to buy his DVD collection. I was so angry I called the number and left a recorded message. The guy is, in my opinion, a fraud and a snake oil salesman. His number is 888-438-5433.
  • OK, Baylor lost. No excuses. But a one loss Big 12 team might still make the final four. (And I told you I had a very bad feeling about that Oklahoma game.) And I also said weeks ago that an Oklahoma team would win the Big 12. I'm a Sports Genius. A depressed Sports Genius this Monday but a Sports Genius nevertheless.
  • I've mentioned this before but I still remember when I turned 18 that I went to the Bridgeport Post Office to fill out my registration card in case there was another draft. Vietnam had recently come to an end.  I handed the card back to the man and I asked, "Is that all there is to it?" He looked at me and with a stern look said, "You better hope so."
  • There is an Amber Alert on right now for a child named "Twinkle Twinkie Twilight".
  • Shout out to Community Bank in Bridgeport for the card you sent me after I opened up an account. You may do that for everyone but I'm assuming you don't. And special shout out to two ladies  -- that was a hard day for me.
  • Mrs. LL emailed me on her trip to Indiana on Friday and said she just went through Effingham, Illinois.  Not only is that a funny name, but there was a family who moved into my Bridgeport neighborhood as a kid who came from Effingham.  And when I was DA, after they were long gone, there would be a crime committed in that house which led to a prosecution and trial which still haunts me. (And a lawyer in town as the front page of the Wise County Messenger framed and hanging on his wall.)
  • So Dez Bryant drops a ball and doesn't make a decent effort on the last play. The explanation is obvious: Dallas the Monkey kept him up the night before.





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