Whoa!

A WFAA crew's heading to Bridgeport, where a home has reportedly exploded. (Photo: Joe Duty / Wise County Messenger) pic.twitter.com/2xEgu8KUDt

— WFAA-TV (@wfaachannel8) March 11, 2016

After Two Years, Johnny Football Is Out Of Job

Timeline: How QB Johnny Manziel went from Texas A&M legend to a partying bust https://t.co/MoQB2Dti44 pic.twitter.com/Z1ro7HpWYV

— SportsDayDFW (@SportsDayDFW) March 11, 2016

Bernie Bits!

Trump Rally This Morning Goes All Gangsta

Battle lines drawn at Trump rally pic.twitter.com/Y9yRTnjOAm

— Trymaine Lee (@trymainelee) March 11, 2016

Language warning.

(There is so much going on in this short clip that it's like looking at a great painting.)

California Lawyer Gets Beat Up By DA's Investigator

(Source) — The 10th floor of a Santa Ana courthouse was the site of a bloody brawl Wednesday between a defense attorney and an investigator from the Orange County district attorney’s office, authorities said. The fight erupted about 10:30 a.m. in the courthouse hallway between defense attorney James Crawford and the unidentified investigator, according to Orange County Sheriff’s Lt. Mark Stichter. Crawford, who recently won a high-profile court victory against the district attorney’s office in the ongoing jailhouse snitch scandal, was left bleeding, battered and bruised. It’s unclear what, if any, injuries the investigator had. Jerry Steering, a lawyer representing Crawford, said his client was in the courthouse to represent a woman who was subpoenaed to testify. The D.A.’s investigator was assigned to watch over the woman, he said. When Crawford approached his client, the investigator disparaged defense attorneys as “sleazy,” Steering said. Crawford replied that defense attorneys were no worse than the Orange County district attorney’s office, which has been mired in an ever-widening scandal over the use of testimony from inmate informants. As Crawford walked away, the investigator flicked a large paper clip at the lawyer, Steering said. Crawford then tossed the clip back toward the investigator. “The investigator then grabs [Crawford’s] head and slams it into the bench and then punches him like 10 times in the face and head,” Steering said, adding that sheriff’s deputies and officers from the Santa Ana Police Department had to remove the investigator.

If they don't set up a rematch in the octagon and make it pay-per-view, they are missing a golden opportunity.

Note to investigators in the Wise County Courthouse: Don't even think about it! I have ninja moves!

Random Friday Morning Thoughts

• I'm going to need signatures on a petition to get me on the ballot for District Attorney in the fall. I'll be posting a link later today on how it works. #MakeTheDistrictGreatAgain #INeedATruckCap #Fabulous #Luxurious #I'llBuildAWallOnMontagueBorder #TheyWillPayForIt
• "Rainy Days and Mondays [Through Saturdays] Always Get Me Down"
• Dr. Ben Carson is going to endorse Donald Trump? You still want him as your brain surgeon?
• I went up to the courthouse yesterday to retrieve my umbrella and ended up in a 30 minute discussion on socialism.  I got drawn out of my three point stance. I'm neither for or against it but I love talking about it. I told one of the courthouse workers that I bust my butt working but I suspect she busts her butt more, yet I got to go to Hawaii last year and she could not. How is that fair? It was the Socratic Method of fueling the discussion and it was fantastic.
• Monroe, Louisiana has receive 20.97" of rain. Somebody needs to check on those Duck Dynasty boys. 
• Star-Telegram headline: "Controversial African Elephants Land At Alliance Airport". Controversial? They part of the Black Panther Party or something?
• Crazy discussion yesterday with someone: If you were under indictment and facing prison and you wanted to flee, could you get away with it? The first thing on the other person's list of things to do: Plastic surgery. 
• Email I received yesterday: "Ok here is a tip that sounds gay, but is not gay.  If you are interested in kayak fishing, search kayak fishing on Pinterest.  They have a ton of cool stuff and modifications that folks have made to trick up their kayaks."
• I'm totally concur with BagOfNothing's comment about Anna Kendrick. She jazzes me to no end.
• Note to local and national news sites: If you have a link to a story that has a story but also has a video that automatically plays, I'm out. 
• I had someone pass me and almost hit me in a school parking lot for the opportunity to sit and wait one car spot in front of me for two minutes until the doors opened. I so wanted to go off of him/her for being a moron. And that's why I don't need a CHL.

Trump and Ali G

I've always been a sucker for Ali G. Borat is a very close second but Ali G has always been my favorite.

Warning: Do Not Protest At A Trump Convention

You'll get sucker punched by a supporter and then a mountain of cops will move in on you.

Pretty Accurate

Marco Rubio never had a base: https://t.co/bWsO7GYU1W pic.twitter.com/NEmrlqVOUN

— FiveThirtyEight (@FiveThirtyEight) March 10, 2016

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• I've been looking for ladies with an attitude. Seen any?
• I'm always confused. Should I turn around so I won't do what?
• Lake Bridgeport is two feet over its designated limit. 
• I have been telling you for years that the Dallas Mavericks are headed to disaster because (1) Dirk is getting old and (2) Cuban doesn't draft anyone and can't land a free agent. Now it is happening. And what you are seeing now is what you will see for 10 years. #SportsGenuis
• Nancy Reagan will have an "invitation only" funeral. That concept seems weird. Why not hold it in arena where everyone who loves her can come and show their respect? And I'm almost sure she would be horrified by "an invitation only" funeral.
• I'm seeing more and more trucks with the massive front grills on the front. What's the point of that? Do you plan to run into stuff or does it serve some other purpose?
• I have to get you guys a picture of the 22 Pound Family Cat which will depict how big that thing is. And the crazy thing is that it is as quick as a leopard. 
• The Big 12 Tournament fires up for real today (TCU beat WVU  Tech yesterday) and #22 Baylor plays #23 Evil Empire this morning. The New York Times today has a story entitled, "Big 12 Emerges As The Mightiest Of Them All". 
• BagOfNothing called me out for calling 538.com "always deadly accurate". OK, that might have been a little over the top on my part. But they did predict 50 of 50 states in the last presidential election. And they say at this point it would be impossible for Trump to win if he is the Republican nominee. Yet I'll bet the house on their prediction Trump wins Illinois and Florida in the upcoming days. Once again, it's over. 
• There is some weight loss contest going on at the courthouse. There are 10 involved but so far they have been sworn to secrecy who is involved. (I don't know why -- I find it inspirational). I will crack this code. I know it also involves men. So far I've pegged one sweet lady on the third floor and one other sweet girl. I'm like Tom Hanks in The Da Vinci Code.

s

Oh, My!

UPDATE: Brock Osweiler has reportedly signed a 4-year/$72M deal with the Texans pic.twitter.com/cv1ULdrA3O

— Bleacher Report (@BleacherReport) March 9, 2016

Denver Bronco quarterback Peyton Manning retires so they then will rely on the backup. That didn't work out as planned.

I'm still trying to figure out the guaranteed money. I bet it is huge.

It's Over

This is from fivethirtyeight.com which is always deadly accurate. If you like politics, they have much more.

Another Case I Could Win Without Saying A Word

(DailyMail) — A woman who stood between an armed police officer and her dog has been acquitted of obstructing justice. Tiffanie Hupp, 23, was arrested on May 9 last year after she stopped West Virginia state trooper Seth Cook from shooting her dog Buddy, who was chained to a wall at their home in Parkersburg. During a jury trial which was concluded on February 29, Cook said he had been trained to shoot dogs, whether or not they are chained. Cook had been called to the property to solve a dispute between Hupp’s husband’s stepfather and a neighbor.

Someone explain to me how the prosecutor's office didn't scribble a note and send it back to the trooper which read, "Refused. You are out of your mind if you think I'm going to prosecute this."

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts

• Peyton Manning's retirement speech was perfect until he ended it with "and God bless football."
• I'm not sure I knew there was a Cool, Texas. The 7th Grader in The House thought that was the greatest name ever. I may form a town named "Smooth" or "Chill".
• Remember yesterday when I said there would be flooding in Bridgeport and Paradise? This is from the Update this morning:  "The flooding seemed especially bad in the Paradise and Bridgeport areas where numerous water rescues were reported where cars became flooded in high water, and the drivers often had to wait for rescue on the roof." I am a weather expert. Edit: I screwed this quote up it was from yesterday. I'm still an expert, but I made a huge mistake. 
• And The Star-Telegram says Lake Bridgeport was closed due to "high water". My weather prediction yesterday that it would peak over the Runaway Bay bridge might come true. 
• Shout out to Boyd PD who gave me a call yesterday after I criticized their video software. I admitted that it was more of a frustration on my end because I had to download some Codec (which I have no idea what it is) to get it run. But the funniest line of the week came from the sergeant after I told him that: "What are you running? Windows 95?"
• I had forgotten that the shooting in the Southlake town square a couple of years back involved a victim who was an attorney who had allegedly represented the cartel. The case has expanded. 
• Random airline I had forgotten: Braniff.
• "Texas Gov. Greg Abbott forms task force on college affordability, workforce development."  When ever I see the words "task force" I see the words "time waste".
• I bought sunglasses online yesterday from some company named "Costa". They were glasses perfect for fishing and, after catching one fish so far this year, I'm now a bonafide angler. But when I went to a Dallas Morning News article online this morning there was a Costa ad on the side. That is not by coincidence.
• This is bizarre: Kyle Odom, the man suspected of shooting Tim Remington after the pastor spoke at a Ted Cruz rally, has been arrested in Washington DC after he  “threw unknown material over the south fence line at the White House complex”.
• 72 hour rain total for Decatur: 4.72"
• President Obama will not be at Nancy Reagan's funeral. He will be at South by Southwest in Austin. Bro down. 
• My dream of "I'm in school but haven't been attending a class and I'm worried" have come back. And they are more intense. 
• There was someone on the Wise County felony docket this week who had the last name of Compton. As in, straight out of. Made me laugh.
• I don't think there are more wrecks by any company other than by Fed Ex. There's a new one this morning. Pic. But, hey, I need my sunglasses!!!! Step on the gas and get on it!
• I'm still laughing. I saw one Wise County male employee walk in on another male Wise County employee in the bathroom (a friend), scream "Good lord", slam the door, and then walk away saying, "I've never seen anything so small". I've always said the third floor could be a sit-com.

Shut Down The Book In Photo Contest - We Have A Winner

Bloods gang member arrested after Fresno traffic stop leads to gun, drug bust https://t.co/5Trs9Q5heC pic.twitter.com/aZIihlwwNe

— ABC7 Eyewitness News (@ABC7) March 8, 2016

Gucci?

Naked Lady On Truck Snarls Traffic In Houston

I thought I posted this yesterday but it apparently didn't go through.

There is a lot of media coverage on it. 

Who Amongst Us Has Not Pranked A Co-Worker By Dressing Up As a Bear?

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts

• Well, I've been up all night in the Liberally Lean Mega Storm Super Center Laboratory studying charts, radars and data that most of you wouldn't understand. I predict more flooding in Bridgeport. I predict more flooding in Paradise. And (drum roll, please) I also predict Lake Bridgeport flooding which will cause the Runaway Bay bridge over the lake to go under water. 
• I ate at Rudy's BBQ for the first time. It was good, and I'm a huge fan of the table side BBQ sauce. The only downside was that I had to listen to some bro-country music.
• Dear Boyd PD: That L3 Communications video recording software. "Flashback" they sold you is the biggest piece of junk I've seen in all my years of reviewing police videos.
• My head exploded when I learned that the verdict in the Erin "You Saw Me Naked!" Andrews case was $55 million. Idiocracy continues to arrive. There are two issues here. First, is the hotel liable at all? No! They simply granted a request of a guy for a specific room. The second is the amount of damages. That is, how harmed was she? If you are a young neurosurgeon who was paralyzed and will also be in constant pain due to someone who was grossly negligent, that might be fair. But for that amount of money to be awarded to someone who was (possibly) humiliated is a joke. Who out there wouldn't take "only" $1 million to be videotaped naked without theirconsent? And I will concede that I'm in the minority on issue number two. Mrs. LL thinks I'm out of my mind. 
• But here is the question of the day: What is your price if someone videoed you naked without your consent? Mine is around $50. I'd go down to $25 if I was caught flexing my muscles and sucking in my gut. 
• There were two lightning strikes near Decatur yesterday around 11:45 which were about as loud as I have ever heard.
• Paradise received almost 4" of rain yesterday? That's insane and was not predicted. 
• Shout out to the one reader who is a Dennis Prager fan: Yesterday he said, (1) Fracking was wonderful and pointed out that its "founder" had died in a car accident and then said "rest in peace"  -- he declined to mention the guy had been indicted the day before and probably committed suicide. (2) Later he actually asked if Iraq  is considered to be in the Middle East. (I'm not making that up.)  (3) And earlier he pronounced Mark Cuban's name as "KEWbawn".   And I get all this by listening to him about 30 minutes every month.
• 60 Minutes had a segment last week where they interviewed Texas death row inmates. I'll say it for the millionth time: In 50 years the public will look back in horror that the government was allowed to kill people.
• Fox 4 fill-in traffic guy Todd Carruth is a faithful reader. Mrs. LL saw him this morning and thought he looked like Gary Oldman in The Fifth Element. She even created a side by side photo.
• I always forget the name of the tree that blooms white every March. This year, unlike the past, has been beyond beautiful.
• I had a fantastic conversation yesterday with one of Fort Worth's most prominent and nicest lawyer there is. He told me things relevant to Wise County that even I didn't know.
• There is a bird that chirps outside every morning and it sounds exactly like "skeet skeet (pause) skeet skeet" which then causes me to have Get Low stuck in my head.

Firing It Up

I'll Be Firing Up The Weather Center Tomorrow

And the officially Liberally Lean weatherman says the next two days are going to bad. This guy has always been more accurate than Delkus.

Kid Tries To Take A Charge - Pays Consequences

I think it is out of Indiana

Pioneer History Of Wise County

I mentioned I had found this book a few weeks ago, and I've been making my way through it. It was written in 1907 and reads like poetry in addition to the fascinating facts it tells. For example, look at this paragraph about the "Peace Party" which may or may have not consisted of Union sympathizers during the Civil War.  This was after the "Great Hanging" in Gainesville:

The trial commissioners occupied the upper story of the Confederate Arsenal [in Decatur], the office of the latter being on the ground floor. Sentinels were placed about the town, one or two on each road leading therefrom. Mysterious midnight searches, investigations and arrests now followed and the county was thrown into a fit of excitement. The trials began with the arrival of the first prisoners and continued until the question of guilt of all the accused parties was settled. Some were found to have rendered only a perfunctory allegiance to the secret order, and these were ordered detained to be sent later to the Confederate Army. Out of the number tried five were adjudged totally guilty and sentenced to capital punishment. The names of these unfortunates were: John Conn, Ira Burdick, Jim McKinn, Parson Maples and — Ward. John Conn had been a member of the Confederate guard sent from Wise County to Gainesville to remain during the trials there. At the ending of their respective trials each of these men were conveyed to a tree which stood in the Swan pasture at the western edge of town, and hanged by the neck until dead.

Anyone know where Swan pasture is?

Random Monday Morning Thoughts

• A couple of months back Texas Monthly had a story of some deer disease called Chronic Wasting. There were a few paragraphs dedicated to how the fear of it effected deer breeders Terrie and Steve Moss near Chico.
• Note to Bridgeport: Do you really need four stop signs and a stoplight in your downtown?
• I got my first official fish over the weekend. That is if you call foul hooking a catfish with a Rat-L-Trap actually catching a fish. 
• What's up with this "Harvest America" Christian gathering that filled Jerry World yesterday? And I had never heard of pastor George  Greg Laurie. (The fact that he has written 70 books makes me suspicious. And for Ticket fans, it reminded my of Carlton Maxwell.)
• Speaking of The Ticket, your weekend programming which consists basically of hockey and soccer coverage is a beating.
• The EMS vehicles of Wise County have the most tricked up emergency lights ever. One of them is a green circle where it loops into four quadrants. 
• Sad to hear of the passing of Nancy Reagan. Her often mocked "Just Say No" campaign was genius because we still remember it. 
• There was a Dallas Morning News story over the weekend about how, in a crazy situation, a young lady died of heroin that she was injected with. I will say this: Meth will ruin you life but heroin will kill you. You should have the right to risk death, but you would be an idiot to mess with that stuff. 
• Trump will win Michigan and Illinois and he has a chance to win Florida. It's over.
• And if the Republicans try some crazy procedural trick at the convention to put someone else on the ballot it will be (1) Chaos, and (2) Cause Trump to go Independent out of spite which will give Hillary a 100% chance of winning. 
• Mrs. LL took a kayak voyage to a small island on Lake Bridgeport this weekend. It was a long way away. And she took The Family Pup with her who was wearing a doggie life jacket.
• I don't understand this "settlement" between FanDuel and Texas where FanDuel agreed to "stop accepting paid entries." Why totally concede? And AG Ken Paxton is out of his mind. If you don't use FanDuel, you don't care. If you do, you know have him in your figurative cross-hairs as a voter. And credit DraftKings who say they will fight Texas because what they are doing is legal under the federal law based upon the Supremacy Clause. 
• "Idaho pastor shot in the skull after praying with Ted Cruz [on Saturday], manhunt underway for former Marine"