It's Friday. Let's Get Out Of Here

 Always keep your eye on the skateboard (although I guess he did, literally.)

 I've got a question: Why does everyone run like a murder has been committed.

 Not a bad Bicycle Kick. And not a bad Kid Kick (although inappropriate.)

 "Honey, I promise. My undivided attention was on the kid."

 "That second blow felt pretty strong. Let me cheeeeeeeeeeeeec . . . ."

If that's his standard bit, it's a weird bit.

Random Friday Morning Thoughts

• The golf course at Robson Ranch caught fire yesterday. I actually played it a few times back in the day. 
• The FBI didn't really need this right now. From Houston: "FBI agent kills kidnapping victim during Houston raid, reports say."
• From the Star-Telegram about a Wise County inmate. Note: He got out yesterday.:
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• New York Times: "WASHINGTON — President Trump ordered the firing last June of Robert S. Mueller III, the special counsel overseeing the Russia investigation, according to four people told of the matter, but ultimately backed down after the White House counsel threatened to resign rather than carry out the directive." For a man who has nothing to hide, he is scared to death of Mueller. Why? 
• Trump denied the above report calling it, predictably, "fake news." So who do we trust? The Times or Trump? Let's have Fox News' Sean Hannity awkwardly decide for us. This is pure gold. 
  
• Another one bites the dust. (And he made the payment to a a junior staffer "many decades" younger than him who he called his "soul mate.") He made the decision "after prayerful reflection."
  
• The White House shockingly agreed to keep and expand DACA yesterday with a "path for citizenship" for 1.8 million people (there's probably many, many more) if he could get $25 billion for The Wall. Heck, give him the money. It will never be built, and in the next election his base will be mad about DACA and the fact that Mexico isn't paying for The Wall. The boys over at Breitbart are alreadly livid. And Ann Coulter is none to pleased.
  
• I'm beginning to believe the medical profession is the most disorganized profession. 
• Tiger Woods played well yesterday and afterwards many were stunned because he has "two vertebrae fused together." That's what BagofNothing had done. The recovery is a little hard but both he and Tiger will be fine if not better than before. So many people think the surgery is the equivalent of putting a metal rod down your spine. 

Another High Speed Chase . . .

. . .ends with innocent people lucky they weren't killed.

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• Larry Nassar, the disgraced Olympic gymnastics team doctor, received 45 to 175 years in prison yesterday. He deserves everything he got, but that judge was a drama queen playing for the cameras. "I just signed your death warrant," was embarrassing. And Texas prosecutors didn't like it either: 
  
• I'd love to know the number of commentors who admire Alex Jones. I'm beginning to think it might be a pretty good percentage. 
• A couple of days ago they jumped on the alleged "secret society" of the FBI (which has been revealed to be nothing other than a joke from a text message) and called it the "Illuminati." Oh, come on. We all know the Illuminati runs the secret super computer in Belgium called The Beast which will eventually, through the Illuminati, place a chip or "mark" in people so they can be tracked and miss the Rapture. Silly people.
• I've always wondered what those boys at MADD made. This is from 2016.
  
  
  
  
• I had no idea that Wise County's own TV evangelist, Kenneth Copeland, bought -- correction: his church bought him -- a G5 private jet. To make it even more ridiculous, it was purchased from Tyler Perry. 
• Jerry Fallwell, Jr. was on CNN last night defending Trump having an affair with a porn star right after Barron was born. It was an "Aw, shucks. We all sin" defense. He even channeled Jimmy Carter by invoking Jesus' proclamation that if you lust in your heart after a woman, that's the same as adultery. 
  
• I've never seen a story that I disbelieve more than this one: 
  
• The Aggies owe former coach Kevin Sumlin $10.4 million for firing him. It is due in lump sum. Today. 
• "Freedom Texas"  the group who "works to educate people about the sovereignty, security and self-sufficiency of Texas, and promotes its eventual independence" is still meeting in Wise County. I checked out its home page. It's a rant against Muslims and President Obama with statements like, "We cannot understand why Obama does not do more . . . ." They might want to think about an update.

DeLorean Wrecks Near SMU

Marty apparently didn't get it up to 88 mph.

Above The Fold

Full pdf here.

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts

• It looks like the Wise County Courthouse will get a metal detector for the first time in its history. If my tremendous sources are correct, the public will not be allowed to use any of the four glass courthouse doors but will instead be funneled into the basement on the Southeast corner of the building. (The basement, by the way, looks like a scene from some type of horror movie.)
• Some, if not all, of courthouse offices have a new phone system. The screen shows the current weather and, get this, the next county holiday.
• Want to see the stitches after back surgery? BagOfNothing's wife posted a picture. That's not too bad. 
• "Five months after opposing a motion to recuse 19th State District Judge Ralph Strother in the case of a Twin Peaks defendant, prosecutors from McLennan County District Attorney Abel Reyna’s office filed a last-minute motion Monday morning to remove Strother from hearing two bikers’ cases." That DA's office continues to scared and way in over their heads. 
• On Twitter, I'll see high school athletes tweet all the time, "I'm happy to announce I have received my sixth offer from [Baylor/UT/TCU/etc.]"  What they mean is that they have already received five offers from different schools and a new one has entered the mix. But it sounds like he's received six offers from one school. Drives me nuts. 
  
  
  
  
• A Texas DA asked local cops for help by asking them to review the list of potential jurors for those that would be inclined to impose the death penalty in an upcomng capital murder case. Honestly, there's nothing wrong with that. (There was an allegation that at least two potential jurors had been contacted by the cops. There would be something seriously wrong with that.)
• Watched some testimony in a DWI case yesterday where the defendant said she was brought up to "never trust cops" and "always say no." Let's see how that plays out. 
• Toys R Us is going to close 182 stores.  #winning
• Irving based Kimberly Clark will layoff up to 5,500 people. #winning
• Last night, with 25 seconds remaining, OU tried to finish off #5 Kansas by launching a three pointer. As the ball arched and headed towards the rim, this happened:
  
• I'd have to research it, but off the top of my head I'm not sure taking a BB gun to school is illegal. You can't bring a "firearm" to school but "firearm" is defined as "any device designed, made, or adapted to expel a projectile through a barrel by using the energy generated by an explosion or burning substance or any device readily convertible to that use." Texas Penal Code 46.01(3) and 46.03. If I'm wrong, I'm confident I will be told shortly. (I'm assuming it's one of those BB guns that you cock or pump instead of powered by a CO2 cartridge.)
  
• We've had two school shootings this week. And it is Wednesday. 
• Sooooo Texas: 
  
• No way! Seriously, that can't be true.:
  
• Mueller now wants to question Trump. If his lawyers let Trump do it, they should be disbarred for incompetence. 

So Who Is The Fake News Here?

OK, a lead CNN reporter quotes what others are saying about the temporary re-opening of the government.

What does Trump say about it this morning?

Incredible. He will say anything.

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts

• Breaking: Five kids shot in Kentucky high school.
• I had no idea that the Fort Worth Golden Gloves is still going on. 
• I've never understood "halftime adjustments". Heck, if the defense is struggling in the first quarter they will all be on the sideline at some point. Make "adjustments" then. 
• An Oklahoma rig exploded and five workers are missing. You don't here about rig explosions very often (other than offshore wells.)  
• Personal note to whomever told me to go and listen to a January episode of This American Life. You were correct, it was right up my alley. 
• Ummmmmm . . . . 
  
• Ending the government shutdown until Februay 8th means Congress will be back to square one in two weeks. 
• The guy in the Eagles jersey who ran into a subway pillar granted national interviews yesterday revealing his name (Jigar Desai.) He's even dumber than I thought he was. (You would think that would be a unique name but a Google search will show it also belongs to a physician, lawyer, and a student at UTA.)
• I've had enough of the "Dilly! Dilly!" crap. 
• That Amazon grocery store is almost like an episode of Black Mirror. You scan your phone as you walk in, grab what you want, walk out, and money is taken out of your Amazon account. They know what you take by hundreds of high tech cameras/sensors along with shelves which detect changes in weight. (If you take something all the shelf and put it back, Amazon knows.) 
• Wise County has offered a job for the soon to be vacated Director of 911 addressing. According to the Update,  'If [he] accepts the position he will oversee 911 addressing and the county’s 108 dams under the National Watershed Coalition" We have 108 dams? What's the definition of a "dam"?
• VP Mike Pence visited the Israeli controlled Western Wall. Male reporters were allowed up front. Female journalist were placed in the back and had to stand on chairs to see. Our "greatest ally" in the Middle East sure is progressive. 
• Very random basketball note: Some school named Purchase College (enrollment 4,121) pulled off a crazy buzzer beater last night and the kids acted like they had won the NBA Championship in what appears to be a basically empty arena. 
• Trump deleted a tweet this morning. I'm trying to figure out what it said. 

Let's Settle This In The Octagon!

District Clerk Tom Wilder and Republican challenger Frank Palomino exchange words at the Editorial Board. (1 of 2) pic.twitter.com/xZvZ5YNJxY

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) January 22, 2018

District Clerk Tom Wilder and Republican challenger Frank Palomino exchange words at the Editorial Board. (2 of 2) pic.twitter.com/es54LVWuzj

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) January 22, 2018

Funny

Eagles fan runs into subway column. pic.twitter.com/PxcQyF8yrH

— Gordon Keith (@gordonkeith) January 22, 2018

Above The Fold

Full PDF here.

Random Monday Morning Thought

• If Stormy Daniels has a non-disclosure agreement with Trump, she violated it with her poster at her appearance at a club over the weekend. But what's Trump going to do, sue her? "Plaintiff had an affair with defendant and, years later, entered into an agreement with the defendant not to disclose the affair."
• For there to be a government shutdown, government sure does appear to to be open. 
• Note: The Republicans needed 60 votes. They couldn't even get a majority [Edit:] of the total Senate seats of Republicans with five voting against the proposed deal.
• Addressing the Pro-Life Rally in D.C. on Friday, Trump said, "Right now, in a number of states, the laws allow for a baby to be born from the mother's womb in the ninth month. It is wrong, it has to change."
• Dallas County Republicans are suing to kick 128 Democrats off the ballot contending "that Dallas County Democratic Party Chairman Carol Donovan didn't sign the petitions of 128 Democratic Party." First, that's a sleazy move. Republicans can't win in Dallas County so resorting to this kind of tactic -- which will fail -- makes them look bad. Secondly, for all things holy, don't use a petition to get on the ballot. Pay the filing fee instead!
• Alvord's Davey Edwards announced earlier this year that he would get 5,000 signatures on a petition to get on the ballot for Texas Land Commissioner. I said he couldn't do it because the technicalities make it a Herculean task. I looked him up and he is on the ballot. Did he get the signatures or just pay the filing fee?
• I was looking at the campaign reports for Tarrant County DA Sharen Wilson and the largest downer was a $5,000 contribution from a former defense lawyer who now is part owner of the Los Angeles Dodgers? Whey would he do that? But it's a pattern. He donated $2 million to Baylor law school when neither he or his wife have an association with Baylor. 
• Going back to the government shutdown, the GOP's talking point of Democrats not supporting the military is odd. Any person in the military will eventually be paid every dime they have coming to them. 
• Trump working during the shutdown. Any chance there is anyone on the other end of the line?
  
• Anyone seen Ted Cruz?
• The Eagles have won more playoff games in 2018 than the Cowboys have won in 20 years. 
• New England is a 5.5 point favorite over Philadelphia. 
  
• The Women's March was impressive and this photo circulated a lot on Saturday. That is indeed the Women's March in Austin but it's a photo from last year. (It was retweeted 38,000 times.)
  
• Since there is a government shutdown, is Fox News still on the air?